Everything to Lose
by manhattan00
Summary: Tony and Ziva will have to fight to keep what they care about the most. Will it be enough? Will they succeed? Romance, angst, action and surprises. TIVA!
1. NCIS by Thom E Gemcity

**Disclaimer: **I don't own NCIS or the characters.

**Summary: **Tony and Ziva will have to fight to keep what they care about the most. Will it be enough? Will they succeed?

**Author's note:** The story is set in season 5 between Designated Target and Recoil, but there shouldn't be any big spoilers.

**I also really really want to thank my beta-reader, three.steps, who spent a lot of time correcting and improving my fic. Thank you Jessica!**

Read and enjoy!

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CHAPTER 1

**- NCIS by Thom E. Gemcity -**

It was around 11am on a Monday morning. The squad-room was unusually quiet which Ziva didn't seem to mind. She was having a hard time enough dealing with the tension that she was slowly starting to feel, and stressful noises would only have worsened the situation. She had her eyes fixed on her computer screen trying to stay focused on the report she had been working on for two hours so far. Two hours for a simple report seemed longer than it actually was. In general half an hour was enough for her, even if English wasn't her first language. But somehow, today her computer didn't seem to want to cooperate.

Discretely from his desk, Tony was observing her.

"Damn it!" She exclaimed pressing hard on her keyboard's keys.

"You lost it again?" He asked her looking over what seemed to be a transcript. He didn't need an answer, the look she gave him at that moment expressed much more than any word she could ever say. "Didn't I tell you, an hour ago, to save your work when you're half way through it so that this kind of accident doesn't happen again? I guess you didn't pay attention and see where it led you; you'll have to start it all over again…for the fifth time."

She flashed a fake smile. "Thanks for reminding me, but there's no way I am going to type a new one. They will have to be satisfied with a handwritten one." She pushed her keyboard away, took a paper sheet from her upper drawer and started writing.

But her tranquillity was short-lived. Tony's irritating sniggers forced her to stop.

"Don't make fun of me."

"I'm not making fun of you, it's just that's it's so hilarious." He held the script up to prove to her that she wasn't the reason for his laughter.

It hadn't been his intention, but with this gesture Tony had aroused Ziva's curiosity. She stood up and silently walked towards him. "What are you reading?"

He was so absorbed that he jumped at her words. He took a moment before answering, the time for his heartbeats to return to a normal rhythm. "Nine Crimes In Salem by Thom E. Gemcity."

Ziva leaned over his feet which were, as usual, resting on his desk, and read the title on the cover by herself for confirmation. "McGee's new book? Did he give it to you?" She asked snatching the book from his hands.

Tony was now staring at her, his eyes wide open not believing what she just did. Not thinking twice, very quickly, he took it back. "Not exactly."

"You mean you stole it?" He hadn't answered yet, but knowing Tony it was pretty obvious he had indeed stolen it. She didn't want to have anything to do with it, so she nonchalantly went back to her desk before adding: "Of course you stole it. You had better put it back where you found it before he notices." She kindly warned him even if she was disapproving what he did.

Ziva was right, stealing was bad, but Tony had his own way of seeing things. "He left it in his unlocked drawer for a good reason; he wanted us to find it and read it."

"That's nonsense. If he wanted us to read it he would've just given it to us, Tony." She was already holding her pen, ready to finally finish her report.

"Look, if he's writing about us again I have the right to know, don't you think? And you should feel concerned too, Lisa!" He teased her.

He had a point, they fell for it the first time and it didn't end very well. "And? Is he?" She curiously asked.

"She asks if he is…Of course he is. This story is all about Tommy and Lisa." His grin couldn't be wider. "It's even getting really really hot in chapter 6."

Strangely Ziva couldn't resist. She ran towards his desk again and grabbed the transcript. In no time she flipped through it until the famous chapter. She frowned as she was reading it. "This isn't about them at all." She threw the book on his lap. "I don't know why I am still listening to you."

Tony watched her walking away "He might not this time, but I had to be sure…And you have to admit that you would have enjoyed reading a story exploring the sexual tensions between Tommy and Lisa. I see it in your eyes. Just admit it." Tony teased her again.

"Admit what?" McGee arrived in the midst of their conversation.

Tony straightened himself in his chair trying to hide the book under his desk. He knew that if he didn't give an answer very quickly McGee would suspect that they were talking about him. He had to say something, anything. "Admit what…admit what…Admit that she sucks when it comes to computer science." He stammered before finally come with something that seemed rather convincing.

At Tony's words McGee turned his head and looked at Ziva.

"I do not!" She exclaimed feeling quite offended.

"Ok, you don't. Then could you please tell McGee where your four reports are?" Tony had managed to turn all the attention on her and he was pretty proud of it.

McGee, who was now in front her desk, looked completely clueless. "What reports?"

She couldn't ignore his question. Besides, Tony was making signs in her direction, behind McGee's back, pushing her to answer faster. "It's nothing McGee. Really. It's just…it's just that my computer ate all the reports I wrote today." The embarrassment made her slightly blush.

He frowned at Ziva's reply which confused him even more. He moved to the other side of the desk and kneeled next to her. "You wrote more than one? What's the point doing that?" McGee stared at Ziva with a questioning look.

"Didn't I just tell you? My computer ate them." She sounded quiet upset.

He pulled himself up by grabbing the edge of her desk. "Never heard of something like that before. Let me see."

Ziva got up and offered her chair to him. Tony chose that moment to join them, hiding something in his closed hand. "Ten bucks he finds them." Tony put the money just next Ziva's keyboard.

In less than two seconds four little windows popped up on the screen. "Here they are!" McGee said as if it was easy as pie, but it had indeed been very easy.

"Already?" Ziva couldn't believe it. Now she was not only feeling stupid, she was also looking stupid.

"You owe me ten dollars Ziva." Tony held his hand out on her to receive the money.

"Not even in your dreams. I owe you nothing, I didn't make a bet." She exclaimed with indignation violently moving his hand away from her.

"Ziva, can I talk to you?" A voice coming from upstairs interrupted them.

The three of them looked up to see Jenny leaning on the banister. She had her bad days look and Ziva studied her trying to see if she had to worry or not. "Of course." She answered.

While going up the stairs Ziva had a look down at Tony and McGee, who were watching her. She wasn't sure if it was because of the concerned looks they had on their faces, Jenny's serious tone or maybe both, but suddenly, a very bad feeling came over her.

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TBC… So, what do you think?

**Next chapter should be coming soon and reveal the reason for that strange meeting with Jenny.**


	2. Goodbye Bert

**A/N: I want to thank everyone for their great reviews, I'm glad you like it. Strangely this story has more success in English than it does in French lol.**

**So here is chapter 2, hope you'll enjoy it.**

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CHAPTER 2

**- Goodbye Bert -**

After talking with the Director for fifteen minutes, Ziva finally got out to Cynthia's office. The door wasn't even closed that she was already replaying the conversation in her head. It was the only way she had found to convince herself that it was for real. She cautiously walked until she reached the top of the stairs. She cracked a smile at the childish scene that was playing in the squad-room. Apparently while she was away McGee had discovered that Tony was in possession of the first chapters of his new book and now they were fighting for it. It was funny, but not enough to make her forget what Jenny told her. She turned round and lent against the orange wall.

"Something wrong?" Gibbs' words made her jump.

She didn't feel ready to talk about it yet; she wished she'd had some more time before telling someone. But it was Gibbs. He had probably already noticed that something was bothering her. "Something unexpected would be more appropriate."

Gibbs didn't tell her but he had been watching her since she'd left Jenny's office. He had seen how lost she looked and he already had an idea of what was going on. If he was right, he didn't want to rush her, so he slightly bent his head waiting for her to be ready.

She looked up at him trying to appear less tense than she really was. "You are going to find out soon anyway. Mossad called the Director this morning; my temporary assignment ends today." She glanced at the floor then again looked up at him. "I knew this was going to happen one day, but I was…I was just hoping they would forget about me a little while longer."

For once, Gibbs had wished his gut was wrong but it wasn't. "Today? So you're leaving…?"

"…tomorrow, my flight is at 1:45pm. They already booked the tickets." Her words sounded convincing enough but Gibbs could tell she was disappointed.

Gibbs unwillingly smiled at her. "They seem like they really need you."

Ziva smiled back. "Yes, I don't have the details yet, but according to the Director there is a new threat and all available people are needed to work on it."

"Maybe you'll have the chance to use your ninja skills and kick some butt again." His remark was meant to cheer her up, but it didn't seem to have worked. She still had that thoughtful look. "Have you talked to your father?" He then asked.

"Not since the day I asked him to be assigned here, two and half years ago. We are not in really good terms." Ziva wasn't conscious of it but every time she was talking about her father she was looking down.

Gibbs moved closer to her. She didn't show much, but he knew that it was a lot to take in, even for her. By putting a comforting hand on her forearm he had hoped she would feel reassured. And somehow she did.

"You're not asking me to stay?" She asked him as they started to walk along the hallway.

"I know you can't."

"But you will have to find someone to replace me. It's won't be possible in such a small amount of time. Maybe I could ask them to stay a few more days to…to give you some…more time?" Deep down she was really hoping he would agree with her suggestion. It would give her a reason to stay, what she wanted more than anything at the moment.

"Ziva, you don't have to worry about that, Ok? All you should worry about is how to tell the others you're leaving and how they're gonna take it."

"I haven't even thought about that. They're going to be mad at me for leaving the team." She didn't feel good at the idea of letting them down.

"How can you even think that? They're not going to be angry Ziva." He paused and smiled. "Ok, maybe Abby will, but she's always overreacting anyway." Gibbs tried to reassure her again.

Gibbs kept his eyes on Ziva as she went back in the squad-room. He suddenly remembered the argument he had with Jenny when she hired Ziva without his approval and without even warning him. He didn't want her in his team; Mossad and NCIS don't work together. If he could go back in MTAC, at the moment of that conversation, he would most probably head slap himself. Ziva's attachment to NCIS was one of the best things that ever happened to his team. She was strong, smart and she handled weapons like no one else. Any kind of weapon. Not to mention that she saved his life. There was no doubt that he was going to miss her.

Finding a way to announce the news to the other members of the team became Ziva's only preoccupation.

In the middle of the room, McGee and Tony were still arguing about that transcript. They were both holding it on one side, each one pulling in his direction.

Ziva felt the need of stepping in before one of them gets accidentally hurt. "Are you two done?" She yelled at them.

Tony turned his head towards her. "You're back!" He exclaimed letting the book go what made McGee inevitably fall on the floor. "What did the Director want?"

"She had something to tell me. Something important." She leaned on her desk and faced Tony, who was just in front of his.

Tony looked over his shoulder at McGee, who was carefully locking his drawer. He smirked hoping that Ziva would find the situation as funny as he did. But Ziva wasn't smiling. "Did she give you your own mission?" He then asked as it was how it went for him the last time he had that kind of meeting with Jenny.

"No. It was even completely different."

Tony laughed. "What? Did she fire you?" He joked. Again, he was the only one to laugh and then he realized that there was a chance he might be right. His smile faded as quickly as it had appeared. "She fired you?" He asked again more seriously.

"No, she didn't. Besides, she can't fire me, I'm not an agent, remember? She received a call from Mossad; they want me back…I'm leaving tomorrow." Ziva finally decided it was better if she went straight to the point.

Tony needed a few seconds to assimilate the information. He leaned back on his desk and stared at her. "That's it! The week-end fun-pass is over." He coldly stated. He didn't mean to sound so heartless, but it was either that or losing his temper.

"I guess." She didn't let him know, but hearing those words come out of his mouth had really hurt her. Even more than it did the first time he had mentioned it. Why does he always act like a nine year old when they had serious talks? Probably one of the questions about him that would never be answered, especially not before her departure.

Without saying any more word she headed towards the exit.

McGee, who had remained silent the whole time, stood up. "Where are you going?"

"There are other people I need to talk to." They barely heard her last words as she already had turned the corner.

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Ziva shivered and rubbed her arms at the sudden change of temperature between the morgue and the break-room. She just had told Ducky and Palmer; only one person was left now. She stopped at the vending machine, inserted the money and pressed the coffee button. A hot black coffee. She needed at least that to face Abby. She was already playing the worst case scenario in her head and by taking a big mouthful she was trying to prepare herself for that.

Now she was leaning on the lab's door frame. The music was a lot louder than usual and she didn't know how to react. Abby was standing in front of her microscope with her back to the door, her head was bend down and her hands were resting on the desk like if they were supporting her body's weight.

"Hey Abby!" Ziva said stepping in. Abby didn't answer, she blamed it on the level of the music and repeated it louder. "Hey Abby!"

Abby took the CD player's remote control and turned it off, a sign that she did hear her this time. She still didn't answer to Ziva and kept turning her back to Ziva. Clearly something was going on. "Abby?" Ziva softly asked. "I have something to tell you."

Ziva stopped walking seeing that Abby was about to turn round. And eventually she was facing her. "I know." She tearfully said and then sniffed. "Ducky forgot to hang the videophone up,…I heard the whole conversation." She didn't wait for Ziva to be any closer; she ran towards her and hugged her. "I'm gonna miss you." Abby's words were half hushed by Ziva's hair.

Ziva awkwardly pat Abby's back like if she was the one who needed to be comforted. "I'm going to miss you too."

"Really?" She released Ziva from her embrace.

"Yes, really. You doubted it? I know it wasn't easy between us when I arrived here, but things have changed and I like to think that we are friends now. And it is normal to miss friends, right?"

"Of course we are, Ziva. Of course." She exclaimed smiling again. "Are we going to see you again? I mean before you leave?"

"I won't have much time, but everybody is in upstairs waiting for us. I'm not looking forward to that kind of goodbye reunion, but I guess it's quite inevitable." She explained. "Are you coming?"

"Am I coming? Of course I'm coming…Wait!" Abby suddenly rushed into her office in the back of the lab. "There's something you're going to need once back to Israel. It will help you reminding me."

Ziva watched her wondering what she had in mind. And after a few seconds she saw her coming back holding Bert against her chest.

"Abby, no! I can't take Bert." Ziva exclaimed making gesture in protestation.

"You have to. It's a gift and not accepting it would be rude and hurt me. So take it." Abby was very convincing when she wanted to.

"Are you sure?" Ziva couldn't believe that Abby was giving Bert away to her.

"Shut up and take it!" Abby pressed Bert against Ziva to make it fart and they both smiled at each other.

"Thank you."

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TBC…Sorry for those who wanted to read the actual conversation Jenny and Ziva, but I didn't see the point writing it, it's not that important, the most important is what she said.

**Next chapter will be TIVA. A serious conversation, some realizations, denial etc…So just a little more patience. And don't forget to tell me what you think.**


	3. Kiss and Run

**A/N: Thank you soooo much for all the fantastic reviews! I'm glad you like the story. By the way, I started it a few months ago, so I had no idea they would really ask Ziva to leave; it's just a coincidence.**

**And thanks to three.steps for all the corrections.**

**So here is the Tiva chapter, hope you'll enjoy it.**

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CHAPTER 3

**- Kiss and Run -**

One hour later Ziva was standing in front of her apartment searching through her bag for her keys. It was still early, but given all the things she had to do before tomorrow she had been allowed to leave mid-afternoon. She unlocked the door and entered. She dropped her bag on the floor and leaned against the door to close it. At that precise moment she realized that she had spent her last day at NCIS and she sighed. All the emotions that she had felt since her talk with Jenny, emotions that she had to hold in to seem as if she was coping now suddenly hit her and a tear slid down her cheek she immediately wiped it off with the back of her hand. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She didn't have time to let herself go, she had a lot of things to do before she left.

She was almost done by dinner time. She took the last sweater that was on her bed and put it down in the suitcase that was already more than filled. She sat on it to close it and brought it into the living-room where another one was already waiting. Silently she took a quick look around her still furnished apartment. If it was up to her she would have kept daydreaming for a while but she suddenly _woke up_ as something seemed to have caught her attention. She reached the door and opened it with a half-smile.

"How long were you going to wait? I have a door bell you know. And it's working." Ziva mocked Tony who had apparently been standing there for a while.

Tony let out a confused laugh. He didn't expect her to notice his presence. "You knew I was there? That makes me look quite stupid I guess."

"You should be used to it now." She was so happy she could tease him one last time.

"Yeah…thanks for the compliment Zee-vah!" He ironically exclaimed. "But I didn't make any noise, so how could you possibly know?" The door wasn't wide open, but by slightly pushing Ziva he made his way through it without having been invited to do so.

"Go ahead and come in." She said to emphasize his lack of courtesy. "Let's say that you are not as discrete as you think you are. What brings you here?" She watched him making himself at home in the living-room.

"I thought that maybe you might need a hand…you know, with your packing."

"Sorry but you are too late for that, I just finished. But if you are still willing to help there's something else you could do. I know it's a lot to ask, but the removalists aren't coming until next week, maybe you could keep an eye on the apartment until then?"

"So I'm still smart enough to do something." Tony wasn't in the mood but he forced himself to make a joke. "I'll do it." He added before she could jump on his reply.

"Thank you Tony. I appreciate, really." She walked over to the coffee table, took a bunch of keys and a piece of paper and handed them to him. "Here are my keys and my flight schedule."

"When exactly is your flight?" He asked. Suddenly, shivers started to travel through his body. He had no idea on what caused them until he realized that it was Ziva, when her fingers slightly brushed over his. He panicked and took his hand off. He was feeling something completely new about her but didn't know why. Why now? Their relationship had always been strictly professional despite all the teasing; even that time, two years ago, when they had to fake being a married couple. It would be a lie to say that he never considered it, but it was never in a serious way, until this exact moment. What had changed?

"1:45…pm." She replied.

That was it. She was leaving. She was leaving and with her something else he couldn't put his finger on yet. Something he will surely miss. "So it's definite, you're leaving? Did you at least take some time to think about it?" Unintentionally Tony had raised his voice slightly.

Ziva didn't quite understand this sudden aggressiveness. She had done nothing but answer his question. "There is nothing to think about Tony. My father personally picked up his phone, called the Director and requested my return. Do you really think I'm going to disobey orders? It's not a game Tony." She was on the defensive and she let him know.

Tony made two steps towards her. "It's all about that huh? Following orders. But let me tell you something that you seem to have forgotten; you just spent almost thee years doing your best to put criminals behind bars. You really believe that you can go back to your spying, killing or whatever, activities you were doing for them, just like that, like magic?" This time he almost shouted.

"Don't do that ok? Don't do that." She looked away.

"Do what? Open your eyes? Maybe you haven't noticed but you're not the same person anymore." He paused seeing that Ziva was still avoiding his sight. "Ziva, look at me!"

She sighed. She didn't need to hear what he had to say; it would only make her departure more difficult and painful. Yet she looked up at him and he continued. "The new Ziva doesn't kill or torture people unless another life is threatened. The new Ziva is an investigator not a killer. You're not a killer anymore, I hope you're aware of that?"

He was so right; she was different now, she felt different. Her way of seeing things had changed, but she was still Ziva and Ziva never agrees when it's about herself. So she contradicted him. "I spent much more time working for Mossad than I did for NCIS. I'm sure I will get used to it very easily again."

She had made a lot of effort to fake a high level of assurance, but Tony wasn't fooled and her confusion hadn't gone unnoticed. "I don't think that lying to yourself is the solution."

"Then tell me what to do. It seems like you have all the answers." Ziva yelled at him and moved away irritated by his provocative behavior.

"You could consider staying." Tony suggested.

"That's your miracle solution, huh? Well I'm going to tell you something, leaving Mossad is not an option. That would mean betray my country and betray my family, so even if I wanted to stay, I couldn't." Now she understood better why she felt so frustrated; she was the Mossad Director's daughter as a result she didn't have a choice. "I don't have a choice."

"But you do have a choice Ziva. We always have a choice. You just don't wanna see it."

"Tony, I am not changing my mind, I am leaving tomorrow and I do not want an argument to be the last conversation we have. Ok?" Ziva sounded calmer but determined to end their little fight.

"You're right, I'm sorry. I don't know what I was thinking. I just came here to help and now I managed to get you mad at me. You don't need that. You were absolutely right before, I'm stupid." Tony shamefully said in a much softer voice and the tension that was present in the room just fell down.

"Don't be so hard on yourself; I am not mad at you. At least I know now that you care a little bit about me." She smiled relieved that the situation had gone back to normal. But she was still wondering what caused Tony's anger in first place. Was he trying to tell her something?

"It's obvious I care about you; you're my partner." Saying these words he became conscious that he didn't only care about her, he wanted to protect her, he wanted her to be happy, and more than anything he wanted to take her in his arms. Unexpectedly he was falling in love with her. He looked away from her hoping she didn't notice his confused look. "Do you want me to give you a ride to the airport?" He had no idea why he had asked that, it was obviously his uneasiness that had spoken.

"Thanks for suggesting, but no. I am going to take a cab. I really do not feel comfortable with airport goodbyes."

Tony let out a nervous laugh and he had that weird smile on his face. "That's funny you know, because…"

Ziva cut him off. "…because what?" She immediately understood that something was going on because he took one of the little statuettes she had brought from her trip to Cairo and was nervously passing it from one hand to the other.

"You know Abby, right? Well, she wanted to do something special for you." Noticing that she was watching him fiddle with the little statue he put it back where he'd taken it from.

"What did she do?" She most certainly wasn't going to like it.

"Nothing yet, she just thought that it would be a good idea to surprise you at the airport to wish you good luck." Tony explained the plan Abby came up with just after Ziva had left the little reunion earlier this afternoon.

"Is everybody coming?"

He nodded.

"Fantastic!" Her annoyance was very obvious. "Is there any chance you can make her change her mind about that?"

"It's Abby we're talking about here, I don't think I…"

She cut him off again. "Please." Ziva begged him. Clearly she really didn't want to see anybody.

"All right, I'll do my best, but I can't promise anything." He truly wanted to do that for her.

"Thank you." She sighed of relief.

Tony didn't know what to say next but he didn't want to be trapped in an awkward silence, so he used a sort of diversion. "Look, I should better go, I'm already late." He lied using a half-assed excuse.

Ziva looked surprised and forced a smile. "Oh, don't make her wait longer then." She said assuming he was talking about his tonight date.

Making her think he had a date was the last thing he wanted. He felt bad but didn't correct her. "So…I guess it's time to say goodbye."

"I guess." She stared at him intensely as he was slowly moving towards her. The closer he was getting the faster her heart was beating. She was well aware of her feelings for him and even if they had deepened the past few months she always had made sure to hide them. All that time she had been waiting for him give her a sign, a move that would tell her he had feelings too, but that never happened and never would.

Tony stopped breathing and wrapped his arms around her. His heart, like hers, was beating very fast, but for another reason; they had never been that close before and he was anxiously waiting for her reaction. Almost at the same time she rested her head on his chest and hugged him back. It was probably the last time he would be able to do it, so he squeezed her tighter and tried to enjoy it as long as he could. He had no idea that in fact this was the kind of sign Ziva had been hoping would come for so many weeks now. There had been a split second during which she had thought she could tell him now, but then her logic took over. She couldn't do it, not now just a few hours before her departure; it wouldn't be fair for either of them.

"Take good care of yourself, ok?" He whispered in her ear.

"Promise." She answered reluctantly breaking their hug.

Tony cupped her face in his hands and slowly brought his lips to her forehead where, closing his eyes, he placed a soft kiss. Ziva had closed hers too and when she opened them again, all she saw was Tony going to the front door and leaving.

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…**TBC.**

**I really liked writing this chapter; it's one of my favorite. Hope you liked it too. **


	4. Your Attention Please

**I love all your reviews, thanks to all of you. **

**So here is next chapter, enjoy!**

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CHAPTER 4

**- Your Attention Please -**

As she had told Tony the day before, Ziva had taken a cab to the airport. Now she was patiently waiting for her turn in the line to the check-in. She was moving her left foot to the rhythm of the music that her iPod was playing in her ears. It helped her fight the stress caused by every step that brought her closer to the counter. But inevitably she was moving forward and soon it was her turn.

"Next!" The stewardess called out barely done with the previous costumer.

Ziva quickly removed her earphones, grabbed her suitcases and walked towards her.

"Passport and ticket please." The young woman said with a pinched smile.

Ziva dipped her hand in the inside pocket of her green jacket and placed the papers on the desk. She watched the woman as she carefully checked them and printed her boarding pass out.

"Do you have luggage?" She then asked.

Ziva looked down and stared at the suitcases at her feet. "Yes, two suitcases and a carry-on bag."

Very quickly the stewardess checked the baggage in and handed Ziva her papers back. "Have a good flight."

"Thank you." Ziva said replacing the papers in her jacket.

She then thoughtfully walked towards the waiting area. Outwardly she seemed very calm, but actually she was all stressed and uncertain in the inside. Tony had managed to make her doubt about her abilities to resume working for Mossad. She had to admit it; arresting people who actually deserve it and let justice do its job was a lot more rewarding. But Ziva always landed on her feet, whatever the situation was, so even if it seemed quite difficult at the moment she was almost certain she would be able to do her former job again.

**One hour later**

Still in the waiting area, Ziva was trying to kill time by reading a book. She thought she would have finished it by the time she would land in Tel Aviv but one hour had passed and she was still on page 3. She had her mind elsewhere, distracted by everything that was happening, and every time she was reaching that page she realized that she had no idea of what had occurred in the previous ones, consequently, she had to start it all over again. The cause for her lack of attention wasn't only the questions about her job at Mossad or leaving her life here; she was also asking herself lots of questions about the way she had handled things with Tony.

Suddenly the melody preceding an announcement caught her attention.

_"Your attention please, this is boarding announcement of flight DL 1307 to New York, the flight is now ready for boarding. All passengers are requested to pass through security check and board the aircraft immediately. Thank you."_

It was her flight. Ziva closed her book, slipped it in her bag and stood up. Turning around she got a glimpse of Abby running in her direction. She should have seen that coming, it was so her. She stayed where she was waiting for Abby to reach her.

"Abby! What are you…? Tony messaged me 15 minutes ago to tell me he had stopped you from coming. What happened?" Ziva exclaimed with confusion.

Abby, out of breath, took a few seconds before answering. "I know, but what I exactly said to him was that I wouldn't drive to the airport and I didn't…I took a cab!" It was with a wide smile filled with pride that she gave her logical explanation.

"One word for you; semantics. And I don't know how it is for you but for me it is just a more polite expression for 'lie'." Ziva replied quite uncertain about the use of the word 'semantics'. She became even more uncertain seeing that Abby was staring weirdly at her. "Oh…ok, I mixed everything up again. But what I meant was that it's easy to turn the words on your adv…an…tage." In the end she slowed her speaking down because Abby made her sign to.

"No, that's right. You got it right. I'm impressed. You get along better with American language, what a shame you have to go already." All of sudden, Abby's look changed again. She was desperately trying to look angry but wasn't very convincing. "Oh, yeah, I almost forgot. What's the matter with you exactly? So you don't wanna see the rest of the team but Tony is allowed to come? That's just not fair!"

"Tony? But what are you talking about? Tony did not come." Ziva wasn't even sure to understand what it was about.

"Yes he did. I saw him with my own eyes. He was just getting in his car when I arrived."

"I do not understand." Ziva was questioning Abby with her look.

"Are you saying that you didn't see him? Well, that's weird." Abby too started to feel confused.

"But…but why would he do that? I mean, come without showing up. It is stupid." She looked around like if she was hoping him to still be here.

"Not that stupid if you think about it. Maybe that my theory isn't that far-fetched after all. You wanna hear it?"

"Not really." Ziva answered honestly.

"Well, too bad because you still will have to listen. So here it is, my instinct combined with his strange behavior this morning, tells me, with near certainty, that he has feelings for you…"

Ziva frowned. "I do not think so."

"…and I also think that he's freaking out." Abby continued ignoring her friend.

"You are wrong. Tony does not have feelings for me Abby. I would have noticed if it was the case." She seemed so sure about it until she made the link with a detail from the previous night. "But now that you mentioned it, something quite unlike him happened yesterday before he left my apartment. You really think that…?"

"Wow wow wow, Tony was at your apartment yesterday? What happened? What did he do? What did he say?" Abby was prancing on the spot of excitement.

"He…he kissed me…on the forehead." Ziva hesitantly said not knowing if it had something to do with Abby's theory. "But that is probably nothing."

"Probably nothing? Probably nothing? Ziva, that's everything. He definitely has feelings for you. What are you going to do? Uh,…I don't know, you could maybe tell him that you feel the same way?" Abby was trying to push Ziva to admit something she already suspected for quite some time.

"What do you mean? We are friends, nothing more."

"I can totally hear you, but strangely I don't buy it. No need to be medium here, my eyes are just enough. Oh! And maybe that's the moment where I tell you that your look 'I'm in love with Tony but I try to hide it' has a few rough edges." Abby pointed out rather sarcastically.

Ziva, very embarrassed started to blush. "I don't think so…Does everybody else know?"

_"This is final call for passengers on flight DL 1307 to New York. Passengers holding boarding passes for this flight please report to Gate 10 immediately. Thank you."_

"Sorry, but I really need to go now or I will miss my flight." Ziva said gazing at people entering in the hallway leading to the plane.

"Would it be that bad?" Abby asked. "No, just forget what I just said." She approached Ziva and hugged her. "Take care and don't forget to call as soon as your plane lands."

"I will."

"So leave now before I start to cry."

Ziva threw her bag over her shoulder and walked away.

"Bye…Oh, and nobody else knows, so don't worry about it."

Ziva turned her head while walking. "Bye."

Abby stayed there until her flight had taken off and completely disappeared in the sky.

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…**TBC.**

**Tony didn't do anything and Ziva left…What do you think?**


	5. Too Late

**Thank you for the great reviews!**

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CHAPTER 5

**- Too Late -**

**Outside the airport**

Initially Tony thought that coming here would be the right thing to do. He hadn't slept well during the night. He had been too busy obsessing over his new feelings and he had come to the conclusion that he had to do whatever it took for him to stop her from leaving. But as he approached the airport he started to feel a knot in his stomach and when he got out of his car it got worse making the slightest move impossible. Since then he had taken refuge in his car waiting for that knot to go away.

A knock on the passenger side window brought him back to reality. He leaned to his right and rolled the window down.

"Ziva almost made me doubt earlier, but I knew it was you." Abby exclaimed passing her head through the window. "Quick question. Could you explain to me what you're doing here?"

"Shouldn't I be the one asking that question? Because I have a vague memory of a talk between us this morning where you clearly said you wouldn't come."

"Technically I didn't say…never mind. Anyway, you weren't supposed to be here either and yet, unless I'm dreaming right now, you're sitting here in your car."

She was right; he was the one who asked everyone to not come this morning. He thought he had better come up with a damn good reason that could explain his presence at the airport. "Maybe, but at least I didn't lie and…and Ziva is not the reason why I'm…" But it wasn't worth wasting time continuing the sentence; he had been so hesitant that she wouldn't believe him anyway. "Alright, alright, I confess. I'm here for her." Tony finally gave up.

"Oh really?" She replied with a more than ironic tone. "And that's probably why you haven't even put one foot in the airport...Wait and don't give any explanations. I don't need one; everything is so logical that I already got it." She smiled.

Tony looked down at his sweaty hands resting on his lap and sighed. "It's complicated."

He hadn't offered her to but she got into the car. "Complicated huh? I would rather say something more like 'it's stupid'. You two are stupid, you know that? It's obvious you like her; it's as plain as the nose on your face. Why didn't you tell her? I'm sure she would have preferred knowing. Maybe it would have helped her be able to tell you about her feelings for you…And see where it led you. She's gone, maybe for ever and you're here sitting on your ass trying to figure out what went wrong."

One detail in Abby's speech caught Tony's attention for a moment. "She feels something for me? Are you sure about that? I mean, did she tell you?" He was as enthusiastic as a child eating candies for the first time.

"She didn't have to say anything; her behavior and the way she was looking at you spoke for her the past few months."

"I should have…wait a second. What did you just say? Months. You're joking, right?" He was completely stunned; that was too much information at the same time.

Abby was amazed to see that none of them had any idea of what the other was feeling. "I didn't believe in it before but the idiom 'Love makes you blind' makes some sense after all and it also applies perfectly to you two."

Tony could feel wings growing on him and now, all he had in mind was to join Ziva as quickly as possible. But it was also at that exact moment that he remembered another detail from Abby's words. _"…She's gone, maybe for ever..."_ It was too late. He had waited too long and let his chance fly away.

His deception was so deep that he got mad and started yelling at Abby. "What kind of sick game are you playing? Why did you tell me these things knowing that she was already far away and that it was too late?"

"I don't believe it. You're blaming me for what happened to you? But for your information, until today, I didn't know the nature of your feelings and it wasn't my place to push her into your arms. And maybe that if you had taken the time to listen to her instead of acting like a child you wouldn't be where you are now." Abby knew Tony was angry at himself, therefore she remained quite calm even if she wanted to shout too.

"Sorry, I didn't have the right to take it out on you." Filled with remorse he apologized.

"Apology accepted." She smiled at him.

"You're completely right, everything is my fault. I guess that's how things were meant to be for us. We all knew since the beginning that she wasn't going to stay. I suppose it's even better nothing happened; everything would have been more difficult, much more difficult than now." Tony turned the ignition key and started the car. "It's time to get back to work, I told Gibbs I was gonna get coffee and that was…" He glanced at his watch. "…Phew! That was two hours ago! We should hurry."

"Tony, just one more thing. I know that you have the feeling that it's too late, but it's not. She still lives on the same planet, right?" Abby said hoping to cheer him up.

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In the plane

Ziva was walking along the aisle searching for her seat. She glanced at her ticket and then again at the seats. She was just standing in front of it; seat number 107. Her neighbor, a woman in her sixties was already settled and smiling at her. Ziva put her bag in the compartment and sat down.

"I'm Susan." The older woman said.

"Ziva."

"That's a lovely name. Where does it come from?" Susan engaged a conversation.

"It's Hebrew."

"Don't hesitate to stop me; I have the annoying habit of talking too much when I'm excited. And right now I'm excited, my daughter just gave birth to my third grandchild, a little girl. It's actually there that I'm going." It was obvious that Susan was a very chatty person.

Ziva very discreetly rolled her eyes. With all the passenger on the flight she had to get stuck with the chatty one. How lucky was she. "Congratulations!" Ziva felt obligated to reply.

"Thank you…So, What brings you to New York?" Susan continued much to Ziva's displeasure_._

"Actually, I'm not going to New York, I'm going back home to Tel Aviv." Ziva couldn't ignore her; she just had to find a way to end that conversation very rapidly.

"Oh, that's great. How was your vacation then? How did you find Washington?"

That Susan was slowly getting on Ziva's nerves. If she asked one more question, Ziva was sure she would explode. "I worked here for almost three years before being called back to Israel." She still forced herself to answer.

"I see. That doesn't sound like something easy." Susan sympathetically said.

"No, it is not."

"Leaving everything behind is never without consequences. How did your boyfriend take it?"

Here came the next question. But strangely Ziva wasn't annoyed anymore; the evocation of a potential boyfriend had brought Tony back in Ziva's mind and it was without thinking that she answered. "I…I do not have one." She answered wavering.

"A beautiful woman like you? I don't believe you. There must be someone."

Ziva closed her eyes and one by one, pictures from the past years came to her mind. The first one being the day she first met Tony. He had appeared so weird and awkward with his 'charades' and the way he had remembered Kate. Others would classify him as immature, but the sexual teasing he was constantly using was the reason why they became friends so rapidly. She never had to watch her words when she was around him. As time went by she had seen who he really was. A very good agent, loyal, funny, sensitive and an excellent friend. He had been there for her several times and had been very comforting when she had to deal with Roy's death. She also had seen him change, become more mature and serious, capable of long-term commitment. And those changes in him were probably what caused the changes in her. She had been the first surprised when she suddenly had felt jealousy towards Jeanne. She had tried to deny it for a while but everything turned on a dime the day she had seen his car explode on the screen in MTAC. That was the day where she stopped pretending that her feelings for Tony were only a fling. Many times after that she tried to get him to say something that would tell her if there was a chance he was feeling the same way, but all her attempts had miserably failed. And even if it was too late now, because of Abby she knew her feelings were shared and that was a very reassuring thought.

"There could have been someone, but ruined my chance and it's too late now." Ziva very thoughtfully answered.

"Look, if there was only one important thing to remember from everything that life has taught me, it would be that it's never too late, especially regarding love. If that man is the right one, then you'll find a way to make things work. I know it for sure." Susan had found the perfect words that gave Ziva her smile back.

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TBC… Hope you liked it.


	6. Dear Diary

**Thanks for all the reviews, it's good to see what people think.**

**Enjoy!**

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CHAPTER 6

**- Dear Diary -**

**At NCIS**

Tony was standing in the elevator nervously staring at the grey doors and holding three cups of coffee and a Caf-Pow. He was just returning from his latest mission; bringing the team caffeine refills. The fresh air had helped him to clear his mind and the satisfied smile he was wearing seemed to suggest that something had changed. He now knew what he wanted. He wanted Ziva to come back and to make that happen he was ready to do anything, even join her in Israel. He had still a few sick days he hadn't used and he was determined to make a good use of them.

When he stepped through the doors, the first thing that caught his attention was the way Abby and McGee were stuck on the plasma screen in the middle of the bullpen, and with his good mood back he was eager to know what was so interesting. He quickly walked to his desk where he placed the coffee cups and then joined them without even taking his jacket off.

"Hot coffees for my favorite friends!" He exclaimed. "What are you looking at?" He had expected some comments on his sudden change of mood but instead all he got was silence. "Hey! What's going on?"

"Shh! I'm trying to read something here!" Abby shouted completely losing her temper.

"Read what? It's the TV." Tony laughed and moved closer to them. A white message on a black background was flashed at the bottom of it.

McGee turned to face Tony. "A plane crashed in the Atlantic twenty minutes ago." He worriedly answered for Abby.

"Atlantic? Like in Atlantic Ocean? Twenty minutes ago?" Tony glanced at his watch on his wrist. "Are you saying that it's…"

"They haven't mention the flight number yet." Abby cut him off before he said what neither of them wanted to hear. "But does anybody know what flight and what company she's travelling with anyway?"

"Wait, wait, wait, there it is." McGee said following the numbers with his index on the screen. "Flight A…F…5…"

"73."

Both McGee and Abby turned round and stared at Tony who just ended the sentence.

"How can you read it from where you're standing?" McGee asked as Tony was standing behind Ziva's desk.

"He didn't read it on the screen." Abby said taken aback seeing that he was in fact reading a piece of paper he was holding between his fingers.

It was the same paper she had given him the day before.

McGee didn't understand what it was implying right away but Abby did. "Maybe…maybe she simply made a mistake writing it down." She could barely talk so her voice was shaky. She had to do something; she had to be sure before jumping to conclusion. She walked over McGee's desk and started to frantically type on the keyboard. "We'll find the right number on the Internet." She started the search but soon her entire body was shaking and she couldn't continue.

McGee leaned over her shoulder, took the mouse from her hands and took over the search. Abby stayed on the chair watching him her hands covering her mouth. As for Tony he was still standing next to Ziva's desk, incapable of moving or talking. He was just waiting to wake up from this nightmare. Because that was what he was hoping it was; a nightmare. He could be asleep in his car or even at his desk; it had happened before. All he had to do was waking up. But he wasn't sleeping and it wasn't a dream. Abby made him realize that when she abruptly stood up causing the chair to hit the wall loudly behind the desk.

"No, no, no, no…no!" She cried out, her words half hushed by her hands that she was now pressing against her lips.

Tony knew what that meant; it was Ziva's flight. It was her flight, but he couldn't believe it, he simply couldn't. He passed her desk and walked to the screen. He held the paper under it and desperately compared the numbers, but no matter how many times he did it, they wouldn't change. He had to accept the obvious; Ziva's plane crashed. However that didn't mean she was dead. Ziva was a fighter and if someone could survive a crash, it was her.

"That doesn't mean she's dead." Tony whispered to himself. "She's not dead." He then said louder walking towards McGee's desk. "Where did they take the survivors?" He asked him.

None of them had heard him walk in, but Gibbs was now standing behind them. "There are no survivors." He said taking everybody by surprise.

Tony rudely grabbed the hand Gibbs had put on his shoulder, violently removed it and walked away from the team. "You don't know that…you don't know that." He yelled.

"Believe me, I would rather not but I do know. The plane exploded at more than 6500 feet and crashed in freezing water. No one can survive that." Gibbs had to fight his own emotions to remain calm.

Tony knew that it was impossible but he had the feeling that his heart had just stopped beating. "No!" He shouted pointing a finger at them and walking backwards. "No!" He was losing the control overwhelmed by all kinds of emotions. Anger, guilt, confusion, pain, fear, sadness,…love. He couldn't stay in that room with the news on the TV any longer. He quickly looked at Abby who was crying in McGee's arms and left running. He ran down the stairs, he ran in the corridor, he ran in the parking lot; he couldn't stop, so he kept running in the streets. He had no idea where he was going; it just helped him to cope. But eventually out of breath he had to stop and face the truth. She was gone. He was on the verge of tears but he didn't allow himself to cry. Instead he started walking and even if it was completely useless he was thinking on what he could have done to keep her from leaving and die. After hours of wandering he realized that the night had fallen and that it was time to go home. He reached in his pocket for his cell phone but what he found were some keys. Ziva's keys. He turned and returned them between his fingers; her apartment was only a few blocks away and he needed to go there.

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Ziva's apartment

Now that he was on her doorstep Tony was hesitating; ashamed to enter. The last time he had been there he had run away like a thief in the night and for that he would never forgive himself. A strange sensation hit him as he passed the door. It was something between comfort and discomfort. Comfort because everything was exactly at the same place like if she was going to come back any time soon, and discomfort because he knew that it would never happen. He stood there, in the living-room, for a moment, studying it. Straight ahead was the bedroom with its door wide open, through which he could see the sheetless mattress lying on the bed. Without really thinking he walked in and sat on the bed in the darkness. He had never been there before and he smiled mentally imagining what Ziva would say seeing him here with no permission. She would certainly threaten to kill him with tweezers or a clothespin. Feeling something under his right foot he looked down and realized he was stepping on a small book that he picked up. There was no title on it. He opened it at the first page and started to read.

_"Dear Diary,__…__" _

Almost immediately he looked away from it. Reading further would be a violation of her privacy. He put the diary on the bed next to him and stretched himself out in the darkness. The silence allowed him to think on the situation. Ziva was gone forever and there was nothing he could do change that fact. He had to accept it. But accepting it didn't keep himself from feeling guilty. If he hadn't acted like a coward this morning at the airport she might still be alive. He was starting to think that maybe it was his fault if everyone around him was dying. First Kate, then Paula and now Ziva. That was enough, he couldn't lose another partner. Tomorrow the Director would have his resignation on her desk. It was probably the most important decision he had ever made, but it was the best thing to do. While sitting up his fingers brushed the diary and it fell opened on the floor. Tony planned to let it where it was and leave the apartment, but he changed his mind when he accidentally noticed his name on one of the pages. He started to read while kneeling, and seeing the date he got even more attracted. 'May the 31st'; she had written those words the day before. He skimmed through the paragraph until the line where his name was mentioned.

_"__…__ Today Tony took me in his arms and it felt exactly how I had imagined it. Warm, soft, pleasant and reassuring. I know it was only to say goodbye, but a part of me wanted it to be more than just friendship. __…__I waited too long to tell him I cared about him and now he will never know."_

His heart started to ache at the idea that she died thinking his feelings were only platonic as actually it was the complete opposite. This time he couldn't held his tears. "I love you…I loved you." He whispered.

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TBC… I'm sure no one expected that. Don't be mad at me and tell me what you think.


	7. Sweet Vision

**I really enjoyed all your reviews, thank you so much.**

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CHAPTER 7

**- Sweet Vision -**

Leaving Ziva's apartment hadn't been easy for Tony, but he had finally dried his tears and made his way home. The thought of her hadn't left him since their talk from the night before and he was more and more convinced that the guilt would haunt him all his life. Leaving NCIS would not help with that, but at least he wouldn't have to see her empty desk all the time. He was so tortured by the whole situation that he had no idea on how exactly he got to his building. He had most probably taken a cab. At the same time the elevator doors opened on his floor the light went off; he didn't expect that and he accidentally dropped his keys. He bent down, groped for them just before switch the light on again. Almost instantly his breath was taken away seeing Ziva sitting on his doorstep. Tony shut his eyes very tight to make that picture go away. He didn't need that; he was filled with enough remorse. When he opened his eyes again, she was still here.

"I'm completely losing my mind." He whispered to himself shaking his head from right to left.

He did the same over again; he closed his eyes tightly, but waited longer this time.

"It's not working." He said realizing that Ziva was still there, just a few feet away from him.

She was appearing to him like she was the day he met her the first time. She was wearing the exact same clothes, the same tan cargo pants, the same green jacket and she was even wearing a white top. The only thing that was missing was that a violet colored scarf that was wrapped around her head.

Why did his mind have to play tricks on him like that? It had been hard enough when the same thing had happened with Kate three years ago. Very slowly he walked towards his apartment looking down trying to ignore the morbid vision. But ignoring it was more difficult than he thought, his eyes were attracted and he couldn't help but staring at it. She seemed peacefully asleep. Maybe that was how his consciousness wanted him to remember her. He quickened his pace hoping that once he was on the other side of the door the vision would disappear. But being so close to her made him lose his composure and he dropped his keys again. He jumped and moved back seeing that they rebounded on her hand.

Tony panicked. _"Don't believe what you're seeing. It's just your eyes playing tricks on you." _He thought to himself as his heart was starting to race.

But suddenly the vision woke up and stood up, and in an instant Ziva was facing him squinting to adjust to the brightness.

"Where have you been? I've been waiting here hours." The vision said with a sleepy voice.

Tony didn't know what he should believe; his eyes, his ears or his brain, but then he started to smell her perfume, the same perfume that was floating over her apartment, the same perfume she wore everyday. His senses couldn't all lie at the same time; that was just impossible. It was not a vision of Ziva; it was really her standing on his doorstep.

"Ziva?" It was the only thing he managed to say in his current state.

"Who else did you think it was?" She smiled. She had expected him to be surprised, but not this much. It was more than just surprised; he had become so pale and she could hear him breathe so he was breathing heavily. "I know it's a surprise, but still you look like you've seen a ghost."

"Be-because…you're dead." He stammered studying her from head to toe.

"What?"

"You're dead Ziva! Your plane crashed this afternoon." Tony explained his voice still shaking.

While awaiting Tony she had tried to visualize this scene with all the different possibilities and for each one she had prepared a little speech that could explain her mind change, but that one was really unexpected and she had to improvise.

"Everybody thinks I am dead?" She asked.

The shock overcame Tony, and he couldn't resist his desire to hug her. He was so surprised and relieved that she was alive that the way he did it was rather impulsive and forceful. "You didn't get on the airplane? What made you change your mind?"

She didn't answer right away; she was enjoying their hug and didn't want to say something that could break it. He seemed so happy to see her that she totally forgot about all the time she had been waiting for him in the hallway.

"You." She eventually whispered her head buried in his chest.

He softly put his hands on her shoulder and pulled her away a little so he could see her chocolate brown eyes. "Me?"

"Abby told me something about you; she was not sure about it, but then you came to the airport. I know it's going to sound stupid and that I probably made it up but I could not leave without knowing if…if you…" She had started the sentence looking him in his eyes but now she was shamefully looking down, afraid it was only real in her mind, and that Abby's intuition was wrong.

"…had feelings for you." Tony finished for her what forced her to rise her head up.

"And?" She kept gazing at him watching each slight detail that could give her an answer. She was really surprised to feel so dependent on his reaction; it was the first time a man had that effect on her and it was kind of scary.

Her question and the anxious tone she used made him crack a smile. "Ziva." Tony started. "Ziva, when your planed crashed this afternoon all my world just crashed with it. I couldn't breath, I couldn't move or speak, all I had in mind was all these things I wanted you to know and that I would never be able to tell you."

Ziva frowned curious on what those things could be. "Like?"

Tony had turned and returned it in his head over one complete day now and he didn't even need one more second to think to answer her question.

"Like the fact that I care much more about you than you could ever imagine. Like the fact that I love that little confused look on your face every time you realize you've mixed up words. I like the way you smile at my jokes even if they're stupid and the way you reply to all my teasing. I also like your strength and the fact that you're completely capable of winning through most dangerous criminals all by yourself. I like it when my heart races each time you enter a room. And I love…I love…you."

She came back to Washington to see if Tony had feelings for her and if they could have a chance together, but she didn't expect him to say the three words right away. He loves her. He just said it and he didn't even seem nervous. Things were going way faster than she had planned. It should have scared her but strangely it didn't.

"Kiss me." She kindly ordered looking at him straight in the eyes.

"Wh…wh…what?"

"Do not make me ask again."

Very slowly, with his fingers he moved her hair behind her shoulder, placed his hand behind her neck and pulled her to close to him. She let him do it and closed her eyes impatiently waiting for their lips to make contact. And when they finally did she pressed her palms on his chest to feel his body. Tony brought her closer and deepened their passionate kiss. For someone who was supposed to be dead only a few minutes ago she felt very alive to him.

"So what now? Are you going to stay?" Tony asked without taking the time to catch his breath.

"That is my intention." She replied kissing him again.

"What about your mission?"

It was probably not the good time for a talk but after what just happened between them Tony needed to know if she really was going to stay.

For her part, Ziva had to tell him about her decisions. "I called my father a few hours ago, during my stopover in New York, and I told him that I had to stay here few more days." At the mention of her father, she looked down avoiding Tony's eyes exactly the way she did it the day before with Gibbs.

He placed two fingers under her chin and made her look up again. "What did he say?" He said encouraging her to speak.

"He said…he said that if I didn't show up there within two days there would be sanctions. But…but I am not the kind of person who gives in to blackmail."

"No you're not." Tony confirmed.

"I got angry and told him that I was not coming back. Then he clearly explained to me that he was considering my behavior as a betrayal and that going back to Tel Aviv would not be worth it because no one would be waiting for me anymore." Tony noticed a change in her voice. She was about to cry, but like always she was in control of her emotions and managed to hold her tears.

"And you left everything behind for me?" He mockingly pointed out and smiled.

_"He is really good."_ She thought as he managed to make her smile. She slightly slapped his chest. "For you and also because I like my life here and my job at NCIS. And you were right; I have changed too much to take my old job back."

Tony stared at her with bulging eyes; she just admitted he was right. Ziva David admitted he was right.

"Didn't you know I was always right?" He replied smiling and placing a soft kiss on her lips. Then he leaned over and picked the keys up from the floor. "We should go inside now, unless you'd prefer to spend the rest of the evening here on the doorstep?" He unlocked the door and gave it a little push to open it widely so she could enter first. He grabbed her bag and followed her. "What do you wanna do? Go out somewhere? Get dinner?"

"Would you mind if we just do nothing?" She shyly replied hoping he would understand.

"Well, that's good luck because I excel at doing nothing." He was pretty glad to hear that she didn't want to go out either. After everything that had happened today he wasn't in the mood. "But there's still something you'll have to do?"

She turned round and frowned.

"You have to tell everyone you're still alive. You don't want them to think you're dead any longer, do you?" He closed the door, took off his jacket and hung it on the coat-rack.

"No, I guess not." She replied taking her cell phone.

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TBC… So, good news, she's not dead! Sorry if I scared some of you, but I know a lot of the reviewers had already guessed that she was still alive or at least they were hoping so.

**I think that that's the kind of event that could lead Tony and Ziva to admit their feelings in the show, so I just wrote it the way I wanted it to happen. Hope you liked it and thanks for reading me.**


	8. Special Agent or not?

**Again I got wonderful reviews, thank you very much.**

**Here is chapter 8, enjoy!**

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CHAPTER 8

**- Special agent or not?- **

The sound of the rain drops hitting the window brought Tony out of his sleep. His body was slowly waking up and with it the soreness on his neck and legs. He brought his hands on the back of his head and rubbed the aching spot. Spending the night on the couch with his legs on the coffee table was most definitely not comfortable, but a simple glance at Ziva, still sleeping, snuggled up against him made him forget about it. It was hard to believe that after the worse day in his life he had spent the best night ever. Ziva was alive. She was with him and he could keep watching her as long as he wanted. Or at least as long as the weather would allow him. In fact, the lightning quickly followed by a very loud clap of thunder had awakened her. She slightly stretched herself and moaned. It was hard to wake up after the good night of sleep she'd had. Unlike Tony she had been very comfortable on couch, most likely because she was occupying all the remaining part of it using his lap as a pillow.

"What time is it?" She grumbled without moving.

Tony grabbed his cell phone on the table and opened it. "It's 11:47."

Ziva stood up with a start. "11:47 am? I told everyone I was going to see them this morning."

"Well, it won't be this morning anymore." Tony said only able to note that they would never be at NCIS before 12:00.

"We have to hurry. I have to get my suitcases back from my car and change my clothes." She said already on the front door.

"Time to take a shower and I'll be ready to go." Tony said sniffing his underarms.

Ziva stopped before opening the door. "Tony, you do realize that we can't arrive there at the same time, they would inevitably suspect what's going on between us."

"Ziva, they will have some other things to think about, like for example that fact that you're alive. Besides, I could tell them that I picked you up."

She raised her eyebrows. "You're right." She answered leaving the apartment.

"I'm always right." Tony smiled walking to the bathroom.

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At NCIS

Thirty minutes later Tony and Ziva were both standing in the elevator on their way to the squad-room. Ziva was blankly staring at the gray doors. She was trying to find an answer to the question everyone would ask: why didn't she leave? She couldn't give the real reason, not yet. Her apprehension was tormenting her and that didn't go unnoticed to Tony; he slipped his hand into and held it tightly.

"Ready?" He asked her.

"Ready." She answered reluctantly releasing his hand.

They had hardly passed the doors that Abby abruptly threw her arms around Ziva. If Tony hadn't had the reflex of putting his hands on Ziva's back they would have both fallen on the floor.

"You can't imagine how happy I am to see you again." Abby exclaimed squeezing Ziva so tightly that she couldn't breathe anymore.

Abby seemed so happy and Ziva didn't dare to stop her. She was just hoping it wouldn't last too long. Luckily for her Tony had a lot less scruples with being cheeky. "Abby,…Abby,…" He said trying to make her release a very uncomfortable Ziva.

After a few more seconds she finally let her go. "Don't ever scare us like that again, ok?" She ordered.

"Promise."

Abby made two steps on her side allowing McGee to greet her too. His hug was way less demonstrative but he was just as happy to see her. "I don't know what to say, except, welcome back."

"Thank you McGee." She replied with a weak a smile.

It was Ducky's turn to approach. He very tenderly took her hands and kept them in his. "My dear, that's what we call a second chance, make good use of it."

Hearing his words she became conscious that by taking the most difficult decision of her existence she also saved it. He couldn't be more right; she indeed had a second chance. "I will." She answered determined to not blow it.

Sensing that someone was staring at her Ziva turned round to see Gibbs standing between the elevator's doors. No one else noticed but with a slight head movement he asked her to join him and without saying anything she executed. Once the door closed, like he always does, Gibbs flipped the switch up to stop the elevator. Being here, in the dark, immediately reminded Ziva of the day where she was assigned at NCIS.

Gibbs placed himself just across Ziva to face her. "You do realize what happened, right?" He asked.

"I almost died?" Her reply sounded more like a question as she wasn't sure what he was trying to say.

"Exactly. And that proves that all decisions are important. Staying was the right choice to make and I'm glad you did. Why did you change your mind?"

"I do not know. A lot of things. I think I simply accepted the fact that all the time working at NCIS has changed me and…" She started to explain and suddenly paused. "Gibbs, I made a mistake."

"A mistake that saved your life Ziva. That's a good mistake." He pointed out.

"I might be alive but I lost almost everything else. My job, my family. It is a high price to pay, don't you think?" Looking at Gibbs she understood that he didn't get it, so she started to explain what happened. "During my stopover in New York I called my father to tell him that I was thinking of staying here some more time and to sum it up he said that this behavior was not worthy of a Mossad officer and he clearly made me understand that I had nothing to do there anymore." She explained trying to keep her tears from escaping her eyes.

Ziva really touched him. Being a father himself he couldn't understand how a father could say that to his own daughter. He had to say something to reassure her. "I'm sure he's going to change his mind. He's your father and you're everything to him." He really was hoping he was right.

"You do not know him. Mossad is his life. He is never going to forgive me…What am I going to do now?" She looked at him straight in the eyes desperately searching for advice and answers.

Gibbs had made it a point of principle to not cross the line between professional and personal with the members of his team but with Ziva it had been very complicated since the first day. She had killed her brother to save him when they didn't even know each other and since then he had always trusted her and always will. And he wasn't going to let her down now. "I know it's not the same but you still have people who care a lot about you here. And there's even one just in front of you."

He said exactly what she needed to hear and made the weight on her shoulder seemed less heavy. "What am I going to do?" She moved closer and leaned her head on him letting herself go in his arms. Gibbs silently kept her against him until she felt ready.

Two minutes later, her tears were dried up and the elevator on his way to the squad-room again.

"If you're still interested on working with us you should go see the Director. I'm sure she can do something. She knows people who know people…You should even go upstairs right away." Gibbs said leaving Ziva alone in the elevator.

As Cynthia's desk was empty Ziva walked to Jenny's office door without being announced. She knocked twice and waited for Jenny to invite her to enter.

Jenny was at her desk apparently very busy with some paperwork. She put her pen down and looked up hearing the knocks.

"Come in." She said loud enough to be heard from the other side of the door.

Seeing Ziva stepping in she removed her glasses, stood up and rapidly walked towards her with a wide smile.

"I'm so happy to see you in one piece." Jenny said kissing Ziva on her cheeks.

"Me too." Ziva smiled but she was already wondering how to ask her about the possibility of staying at NCIS.

Jenny put her hand in which she was holding her glasses on Ziva's shoulder and brought her to the chair across her desk. "So how does it feel to be back from the dead?" She asked now standing between her desk and her chair and piling up some paper sheets.

"I am not back from the dead. I was not in the plane." Ziva stated while sitting down.

Jenny laughed at her confusion. "It's an expression Ziva." She said sitting down on her chair too.

"Oh, right."

Jenny silently stared at her. "Ziva, you look…you look worried. Is it something I can help with?"

Ziva immediately seemed relieved that Jenny got onto the subject first. "In fact there might be something…Gibbs told me to come to you. I want to know if there is a way for me to stay working here even if I am not Mossad anymore."

"You're not Mossad anymore? What happened?" Jenny exclaimed.

"It's a very long story that I will tell you later, but is there a way?" Ziva insisted.

"Well, the only way would be to become an NCIS agent." She answered.

Ziva was watching her play with her glasses. "But it is impossible without the American citizenship."

"That won't be a big problem, I know someone who owes me a favor."

At Jenny's words Ziva let out a laugh.

"What?" Jenny wondered. "Did I say something funny?"

"No, it's just that Gibbs was sure about that. That you would know someone...So how do I become an agent?" She curiously asked.

"It will be pretty easy as you already know all the procedures and given the fact that you are already working her for 3 years. A simple examination will do it. And until I receive your official discharge from Mossad you're still part of Gibbs' team."

"Is it that simple?"

"For you, yes. Besides it's not everyday that NCIS has the opportunity to hire someone as competent as you are. I'm honored that you asked for it."

A few minutes and a few phone calls later and Jenny had arranged everything so that Ziva could take the test next month.

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TBC… I know that it's not that easy to become a NCIS agent, especially when you're not American, but I needed it to be easy for the story so I made that test up.

**More Tiva to come in the next chapter. Just a little patience. **


	9. Bert, the Return

**I'd like to thank every reviewer for taking some time to leave a little comment. I really appreciate it, so thank you.**

**This one is a Tiva chapter, directly and indirectly, you'll understand by reading. That's a chapter I enjoyed writing like always when it's about my two favorite characters. Hope you'll enjoy reading it too.**

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CHAPTER 9

**- Bert, the return -**

Tony was wandering around in the NCIS hallways, apparently looking for something. He was so enthusiastic that having visited all the rooms with no result didn't take away the broad grin from his lips. The last room to check was the ladies' room and he was precisely in front of it. He eagerly opened the door without knocking. He quickly scanned the empty room; he even kneeled to have a look under the doors. This time his smile faded quite a bit, it was really the last place where to look. Then his eyes stopped on the men's room and all of sudden his grin was back. Why hadn't he thought about it before? He slowly opened the door and here she was, leaning on the sink.

"What the hell are you doing here Ziva? I've been looking for you everywhere." He asked carefully closing the door behind him and slowly walking towards her.

She didn't hear the door so she almost jumped at his words. "Isn't it obvious? I am hiding." She answered putting her hands out of her pockets and folding her arms.

"From who?" He stopped once in front of her. He was really impatient to tell her something but he still let her answer his question first.

"Pretty much everyone. If I hear one more time that someone is happy to see me I am going to explode. Do you know that there is a guy, Paul, from the second floor that was happy to see me again?"

"Paul? Never heard of him."

"See, that's exactly what I was talking about. It is funny how you just need to be dead for one day and everyone starts remembering your name. That is why I am hiding. If I do not meet anybody, I will not hit them." She explained looking at him.

"Yeah that's probably better; we don't want you to blow your chance to become an NCIS agent, right?" He tried to calm her down.

"You heard about it already?"

"The news is already spreading all around the building. Nervous?"

"Nope, ready to be done with it."

Tony moved closer to her and put his hands on her folded arms. "Your life is about to radically change and you're not even stressed?"

"Ok, maybe I am a little." She finally conceded smiling.

"Do you want me to help you to study for your test?"

"No thanks, I already have everything…in…my…head." She slowed her speaking down. "Tony, what are you doing?" She asked as Tony was leaning towards her.

"It's pretty obvious. I'm about to kiss you." He replied just before kissing her.

"Wait!" She said between two of his kisses. "What if someone comes in?" She pointed out quite worried.

"Would it be that bad if that happened?"

A heavy sight was her unique answer.

"Understood then, come on." He grabbed her arm, guided her inside of one of the toilets and cautiously locked the door. "Better now?"

"Much better." She said.

Ziva was pressed against the door by Tony's body. She had her arms around his neck and was passionately running her fingers through his hair as he was giving her deep kisses.

"You're an amazing kisser." Tony said to her breaking their embrace. "Why did we wait so long?"

"Don't become big headed but you are not that bad either." She said out of breath. "A moment ago you said you were looking for me, why?"

"Huh, yeah, I have proposal." He said still trying to catch his breath.

Shocked by what he just said, she violently pulled him away what made him lose his balance. Luckily for him his reflex were fast enough and by putting his hands on the walls he managed to stop his fall over the toilet bowl.

"What did you just say?" She asked still stunned.

"No! Not that kind of proposal Ziva. I just wanted to suggest that we could have dinner at the restaurant, tonight. You know? You, me, and a romantic atmosphere." He hastened to add seeing that she misunderstood him. "But you're reaction says a lot."

She frowned. "Oh, uh…you mean like a date?" She straightened herself.

"Considering what's happening between us, I thought it could be a good start. But if you don't want to I don't mind, we can do something else, whatever you want."

"No, dinner is perfect."

"Ok then, I pick you up at 7:30pm." He extended his hand over her and unlocked the door.

"I will be ready." She watched him walk away.

"Oh and don't get involved in any fight before tonight, I don't want you to be covered with bruises and scratches for our first date." He exclaimed before leaving the room.

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A few minutes later

Passing by the door, Abby expected to find the lab empty like almost every time but it wasn't the case. Ziva was quietly sitting at her desk thumbing through the latest edition of Tattoo life magazine.

"Ready to let art express itself on your body?" Abby called out.

Ziva turned her head towards Abby and closed the magazine. "No thanks, I will pass. I was just trying to kill time…we were just trying to kill time." She specified.

"We?" Abby wondered placing her Caf-Pow on the desk.

"Yes, there is someone here who is very impatient to get back home." Ziva said holding Bert up from her lap. "I will not need it anymore."

"Are you sure you don't wanna keep it?" Abby asked taking it from Ziva's hands.

"Yes, I am sure. The lab would not be the same without it anyway."

"That's true, thank you Ziva."

Ziva then wanted to say something, she opened her mouth but no sound came out. She wasn't sure if she should tell Abby, but after a quick reflection, she realized that she was the only one she could talk about it. "Abby? Do you have a minute?" She finally asked her.

"Sure." She grabbed the chair in front of the microscope and sat across Ziva. "So what's going on?"

"I need some advice…from woman to woman."

"Wow I'd never thought I'd hear that coming from you." Abby excitedly exclaimed putting her elbow on the desk and resting her head in her hands.

"Abby, it is serious…He…he asked me out…tonight."

"Are you kidding? Tony asked you on a date? Does that mean that you told him you loved him?"

"Not exactly, it was rather him who talked." At the same time she was saying that, Ziva replayed the scene in her head and realized that indeed she had said nothing about her feelings. Of course she had made him understand that she was feeling the same way but she didn't use words. She suddenly felt guilty.

"Gee, it was about time! So, tell me everything, especially the juicy details."

"Abby!" Ziva exclaimed faking to be offended. "Well, first he was too stunned to see me and could not say anything, and then he hugged me and told me everything about his feelings."

"And what did you say?" Abby had to force Ziva to talk if she wanted to know the details.

"Nothing, we kissed and spent the rest of the night on his couch."

"You spent the night together? Well, that's hot." Abby couldn't keep herself from pointing this out.

"That's not what you think; we did nothing but sleep." Ziva clarified.

"If you say so. So you came to me because you need help for that first date?" She stood up and moved to Ziva.

She nodded. "Yes."

"But that's not the first time you go on a date, right?" Abby was now sitting on the edge on her desk. "What's different?"

"It is different be-because I am…I am already in love with him." Ziva couldn't believe she said it out loud.

"See, it's not that hard to admit it. So let's see how to make that dinner a perfect first date."

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Later the same day

When Ducky had asked him to take an evidence bag up to Abby, Tony had found the perfect opportunity to go see her. He wasn't the kind of guy to ask for advice regarding dates but this time it was very special, Ziva was special and he couldn't allow any mistakes.

"I brought you the samples you asked Ducky for." He said entering the lab.

"Ah Thanks, just put them on the table. I'll check them later." Abby didn't even look up from her microscope to answer him. She seemed very busy and he wasn't sure if it was the best moment to start a conversation, but he couldn't leave either so he silently stayed near the door.

In fact, Abby wasn't busy at all; she was just waiting for her ear to ear grin to go away. She had heard him approach and she remembered all what Ziva had told her a moment ago. Being the only one to know something one can sometimes find oneself in funny situations and she was determined to take advantage of it.

"Can I talk to you just for a minute?" Tony eventually asked hesitantly.

She concentrated very hard and finally faced him with an almost inexpressive look. "Sure, what can I do for you?" She said with a strong feeling of déjà vu.

Tony didn't know where to begin. Of course it would have been easier if he had known that Ziva already told her everything. "I'll get straight to the point. I invited Ziva to a romantic dinner."

"Does that mean that you two…?" She innocently asked smiling.

"I guess we can say that. She spent the night at my apartment…" But realizing that it could lead to confusion he immediately added: "…but nothing happened, we only slept on the couch."

"Oh, that's so cute!" It was really difficult for her to fake being surprised but fortunately Tony was too anxious to notice anything. "And you need me because?"

"I just needed to tell someone about it and you're the only one who knows about my feelings for Ziva, so... Oh and speaking about that, now that she's back, I think it would be a good idea to keep it quiet. Gibbs doesn't need to know. No one needs to know."

"You can trust me; I'll be as silent as a grave." She said putting her index on her lips.

"Thank you Abs."

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TBC… Next chapter to come: their first date! It will be a short chapter but it will also be completely Tiva and I'm sorry but I don't think I will post it before next week, so you will have to be patient.


	10. First

**I've decided that next week would be a too long wait for an update, so I'm posting chapter 10 now. It's a short chapter, but hopefully still good.**

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CHAPTER 10

**- First -**

That same night Tony was parked in the street across Ziva's apartment. His fingers were nervously tapping on the wheel as he was waiting. He was feeling the same knot in his stomach that he had two days ago at the airport, only this time he wouldn't let it take over him. Blankly staring through the window, he was trying to figure out why he was so anxious. They already had dinner together many times before and he had never felt such a feeling. Was it because tonight it was an official date? Probably. And what a date; their first date. He wanted it to be memorable that's why he had a reservation in the most famous French restaurant in town; Ziva loves French food. He also bought himself a new gray suit under which he was wearing a blue shirt.

Every five minutes he was glancing at his watch until finally it read 7:25 pm. It was time to check everything before leaving the car. He tilted the rear-view mirror and checked his hair. Then he placed his palm in front of mouth and checked his breath. And of course he hadn't forgotten to buy her a bunch of flowers - mauve orchids - even if he wasn't sure that Ziva was the kind of woman who cared about flowers. He grabbed them from the passenger seat, got out of the car and walked in the direction of her building.

Once on the doorstep, he quickly knocked holding the flowers in front of him. He really wanted to make a good first impression but hearing her steps behind the door he totally broke down. Luckily for them both, he hadn't time to run away. Then slowly the door opened leaving Tony completely speechless; he had never seen Ziva like this before.

"Wow! You are…you are…" He babbled since his speech wasn't back yet.

"I am what?" She made fun of the situation and smiled.

"Incredibly beautiful." He finally managed to end his sentence. He was staring at her from head to toe so she was gorgeous. She was wearing a long and amazing silver dress, which highlighted her perfect outline.

"Well, you don't look bad either." She replied mocking him. But she had to force herself because she was really impressed too. She didn't know if it was because of his shirt or something else but his eyes seemed even bluer. "Orchids? How did you know they were my favorite?" She took the flowers as he was handing them to her.

"Lucky guess." Tony innocently replied widely smiling.

"Come on Tony, we both know that you are not that intuitive. So how?" She said just before getting a whiff of the flowers.

At her question Tony started to nervously laugh. "Abby." He shamefully admitted.

"Don't be ashamed. I am actually glad you asked her. I really like them." She invited him to enter and went to the kitchen looking for a vase.

Tony closed the door behind him and waited a few minutes. He didn't know that putting flowers in a vase could take that long and again he glanced at his wrist. "Ziva, we should hurry up. The reservation is at 8 and if we're not there in time they are going to give our table to someone else." He said loud enough so she could here him.

She had heard him and came back with a weird smile. "Maybe we should forget about that dinner then. The dessert sounds a lot more attractive to me anyway." She said in a very sensual voice.

He swallowed with some difficulties and watched her as she moved closer to him and grabbed his tie. By slightly pulling on it she stand on tiptoe and with each kisses she was placing on his neck she sent shivers down his spine. "Very…very…very good idea." He stammered.

"Glad we are on the same wavelength." Her fingers, initially on his tie, gradually moved downward along his body until reaching his hand. She took it, walked him to her bedroom and slammed the door with her foot.

The room was almost completely dark; the only light was coming from the street. Ziva was walking backwards, inviting Tony to follow her. What he did. Soon they reached the foot of the bed. She placed her hands on his jacket and made it slide along his arms, while he blindly unzipped her dress, but instead of removing it right away he moved upwards to her hair and undid her bun. She shook her head from right to left and her hair fell over her shoulders, then, one by one she opened the buttons of his shirt. When she was done, Tony put his fingers under her dress' straps and it silently fell on the floor.

The way things were set inevitably reminded them of that time in the hotel room two years ago, but what was happening now was in no means comparable with that night. Back then, there wasn't that passion, that eagerness, that attraction and that need of feeling the other, and above all there weren't feelings between them, and that made a big difference.

Ziva sat on the bed and watched Tony taking off his shirt. He bent forward, put his hands on the bed and kissed her. He then deepened the kiss and made her lie down. He lied himself down on the top of her and felt her warm and soft skin against his. His kisses became more aggressive and passionate as he started to gently bite down on her lower lip. Tony was afraid she would pull him away and ask him to slow down, but she didn't, she liked the sensation and gave him his kiss back. The few doubts that she was still having about their new relationship were now gone. She was sure about her feelings, and she was going to let him do whatever he wanted tonight. She was ready and apparently he was too.

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TBC…

**Sorry to cut things here, but I don't write smut. I wouldn't know how to do it right in English. But I'm sure you all have very good imaginations, so it won't be hard for you to come up with your own end to this scene.**

**Please review!**


	11. Missing Wallet

**Thank you again for all the wonderful reviews.**

**Read and enjoy!**

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CHAPTER 11

**- Missing wallet -**

**Four weeks later**

Spending his free time going between Ziva's apartment and his caused a lot of inconveniences. The most important one being that he had now one more place where he could misplace his stuff. He experienced it with his keys, his sunglasses, his cell phone and he even managed to forget a pair of socks there once. This morning it happened again. His wallet wasn't in his pocket anymore and he couldn't go to work without it so he had no other choice than go at Ziva's place to get it back.

His keys already in his hands, Tony was about to enter her apartment. He didn't usually use them but today Ziva wasn't here to open the door for him. She was taking the exam that would allow her to become an agent. He went over to the couch and lifted all the cushions one by one but it wasn't there. He then slightly lifted the whole couch but it wasn't under it either. Sitting up he couldn't ignore the Chinese food boxes on the coffee table which were all almost completely filled. It was her favorite meal though. Near the boxes, a pile of magazines, he lifted them too just to be sure. The only other place where he could have lost his wallet was in her bedroom. He hadn't even passed the door when he noticed that Ziva was still in her bed. Through the half closed door he could see her; she was totally wrapped up in her duvet and her left foot was sticking out on the side. She was even deeply asleep judging by her snores. Tony approached, kneeled near her bedside table and started to count in his head. _One, two, three._

"WAKE UP!" He shouted, but very soon he regretted it. In less than one second Ziva had passed her hand under her pillow, grabbed her gun and was now pointing it on Tony's forehead. And she did everything without even opening her eyes.

He should have seen that coming; it wasn't the first time. "Easy, easy Ziva. It's me." And very carefully put his hand on the gun and moved it away from his face.

"Why the hell did you do that?" She sat up squinting to get used to the daylight. "What are you doing here so early anyway? I was not supposed to drive you to work, was I?"

"Firstly, it's not early, it's almost 8:30 am and secondly, you weren't supposed to drive me to work given that you should be there, now, taking your test."

"Oh my God!" She exclaimed jumping from her bed. "8:30. I will never be there in time." She was already removing her pyjamas.

Tony glanced at his watch. "With the siren and if we drive at top speed I think we could arrive just in time. But I'll drive. It's better, you know, because we want to get there in one piece."

She didn't contradict him and kept dressing herself up. "By the way, what are you doing here?" She asked him.

"Well, I think I left my wallet here yesterday." He explained watching her as she was passing water over her face.

"It is in the kitchen, on the counter."

"What happened with the Peking Duck? I thought it was your favorite?" He asked her remembering the boxes on the coffee table.

"Oh that? It is nothing, I was not hungry." She got out of the bathroom and grabbed her jacket. "Let's go."

He followed her in the living room. "Are you kidding? When I left last night you said you were starving."

"I lost my appetite, is that a crime? So can we go now?" She sounded quite angry.

"Ok, I see that Miss David is touchy today. I guess we should change the subject." Tony joked, which Ziva wasn't pleased about.

"I am not touchy. You are annoying me with all your questions, and that is totally different, but I should not have yelled at you, I am sorry."

"You don't have to apologize; it's not your fault. It's only that time of the month where you can't control anything." Tony walked backwards and smiled at her.

"Not at all! Besides, how would you know anyway?" She asked opening the door and waiting for him to go through first.

Quickly he grabbed his wallet and followed her. "Observation Ziva, observation." He replied just before she closed the door.

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A few hours later

Ziva had taken the stairs to the squad-room. She was now standing near Tony's desk watching him. He was only a few feet away from the elevator his shoulder leaned on the wall. Seeing him impatiently waiting forced her to smile even if she wasn't really in the mood. She just returned from Quantico where she had taken that famous test and it didn't go well, at least not as well as she would have hoped. It's not that she didn't have the knowledge but this morning, after Tony had dragged her out of bed, she had felt really tired even after more than 9 hours of sleep. And the two dark coffees she had taken after that didn't help that feeling to go away. She was very angry at herself because if she didn't pass that test she would have to go back to Israel, beg his father to take her back at Mossad. Her heart raced at that thought and she quivered. She desperately needed a distraction that's why, making the as less noise as possible, she walked towards Tony and stopped once just behind his back.

"Waiting for someone?" She whispered in his ear.

She was almost disappointed to see that he didn't jump. Instead he simply turned round and smiled at her. "Not anymore…And? How did it go?" He hastened to ask.

It was exactly the question she feared. She couldn't tell him she was thinking she had failed, he seemed so excited. "I do not know yet. They said they would call as soon as they have the results." She explained walking to her chair.

"Come on! You still gotta have an idea?" He insisted and sat on her desk.

"I would say it went quite ok." He was so enthusiastic that she had to lie.

"Of course it went ok. There's absolutely nothing that Ziva David can't do."

"You seem so sure. How do you do that?" She leaned on her chair and looked up at him.

"It's easy. I know you…Let's go get a coffee, you seem to need it." He said as she yawned.

"Thanks but no. I think I will head home. I really do not like being here without having any work to do."

It had been one week since the Director got the papers from Mossad, it had also been one week since Ziva had been taken off the team. Every time she visited them it only reminded her that everything she had here, depended on how she did on the test.

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TBC…

**In the next chapter:**

**- Ziva doesn't know how to tell Tony about the results of the test. Will this unexpected event compromise their relationship? -**

**I gave you a little summary for the next chapter, because I'm not sure how long it will take before I can post it, hope it will help you to wait until then.**


	12. To Catch a Thief

**Chapter 12 came back to me sooner than expected so here it is. **

**Enjoy!**

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CHAPTER 12

**- To Catch a Thief -**

The drive back home had been very trying for Ziva. During that time she kept thinking about the past few days and how much she hadn't been herself. Particularly this morning when she didn't recognize herself at all. Tony had found an excellent excuse for her strange behavior, for him it was just _'that time of the month'_ like he said. She had thought about it a lot today and he had almost guessed it right, except that it wasn't the case; she was late. Not much, but enough to be worried about it. Normally it wouldn't have bothered her, all the changes in her life the past few weeks and the stress they caused could be the reason for her missing period, but she wasn't just late. There was also that fatigue that didn't seem to want to go away and her sudden aversion for the Chinese food. All those reasons had pushed her to stop in a store and buy a home pregnancy test.

The first thing she had done coming home had been run to the bathroom and take the test. She knew that to be really efficient she should have taken it the next morning, but she couldn't wait that long. She was freaking out and she needed a quick answer so she could see more clearly into the situation.

Now sitting on the edge of the bathtub, trying to clear her mind, Ziva realized how insignificant the test she had taken this morning was. The one that really mattered was the one lying near the sink, the one that could change her life forever.

The waiting time was only three minutes, but never three minutes had seemed so long to her. The stress was so intense that at every breath she was taking she felt like thousand needles being driven into her heart. It wasn't time yet, but she was too anxious to wait any longer, so she stood up. _A few seconds would not matter._ She held on her breath and started walking. Approaching the stick she realized that she was right, a few seconds wouldn't change anything anymore; from where she was standing she could already discern the little plus sign. She perfectly knew what it meant but she needed a confirmation. She grabbed the test's box and turned it between her hands before finally find the side where the explanations were. _+ means you're pregnant._

"Damn it!" She exclaimed and violently threw the box in the trash can. "Damn it! Damn it!"

She then took the stick and hit it several times against the sink hoping it would change the result. But as she had anticipated it, the plus stayed a plus, it even became darker.

_I can not be pregnant, I can not be pregnant, I can not be pregnant, _she kept repeating in her head. They were always so careful. He used condoms every time and she was on the pill. How many chances for the two methods to fail the same day? Suddenly she felt her legs weaken. She just had time to reach the bathtub and sat on it before everything around her started to spin. She rested her head in her hands and waited for it to pass. She couldn't believe she was pregnant, even if deep inside she knew it way before reading the stick.

"What am I going to do?" She whispered.

She couldn't have a child, not now that her life just started to return to normal. She didn't feel ready, not ready at all.

The sound of her phone ringing abruptly brought her back to reality and forced her to rise her head. With her hands, she wiped the tears on her cheeks and then stood up and went answering the call.

The conversation didn't last long. She mainly just listened to the person on the other end of the phone.

"Thank you." She said and placed the phone back on the base-station.

One more news to take in. So much happened in the same time that she didn't know how to react. She knew that she had to tell Tony, but how could she get onto it? Like her, he was certainly far from imagining a possible pregnancy. She was completely lost and maybe for the first time in her life all she wanted to do was lying on her bed and cry.

She sighed and closed her eyes trying to regain her composure when she heard someone knocking on the door. She wasn't expecting any visitors and Tony had the keys, so she decided to ignore the knocking. But it became more and more insistent and she had to go see who it was. She looked through the spy-hole and opened the door.

"What happened to your keys?" She asked Tony in a very distant tone.

"I left them here by mistake this morning, sorry." He kindly apologized. "Did I interrupt something?" He added seeing her lost look.

"No, not at all. I was just lost in my thoughts." She was hoping it would explain her blank look. She opened the door wider to let him in. He was acting weird too. He passed her making sure to face her and he had one hand hidden behind his back. "What's going on with you?" She asked.

"Oh no Ziva, you're not going to divert my attention. It's on me to ask a question. So? The results? Did you get them?" He was still showing the same eagerness.

He didn't know just how true he was. She indeed had gotten results, even more than she had wished to.

"Oh come one Ziva. Spit it out!" He insisted.

She had to concentrate really hard to answer with a smile. "I suppose you can call me Special Agent Ziva David from now on." And despite herself her eyes started to light up. She was very proud to have passed the exam. She was a real agent now. At least she won't have to worry about going back to her father anymore.

"I knew it! I knew you would make it! Congratulations!" He placed his free arm around her and kissed her. "So I guess that's a good reason to celebrate. Champagne?" He handed her the bottle that had until now remained behind his back.

"Why not?" She answered with a little voice. She then walked to the kitchen and opened the cupboard.

"No, no, no, Princess. You're the guest today, so let me handle things. Make yourself comfortable in the living-room. I'll bring all that's needed." He took her hand and moved it away from the cupboard's door.

"Alright." She didn't really like it when he called her 'princess' but she got fed up with correcting him all the time and besides, he could have came up with something worse.

He grabbed two glasses that he placed on the bar. From the couch, Ziva was watching him as he carefully removed the golden paper around the cap and uncorked the bottle. He first filled one glass, then the second. And with one flute in each hand he joined her in the living-room and put them down on the coffee table.

Ziva frowned seeing that he went back to the front door and pick up a plastic bag from the floor. She hadn't even noticed he had dropped it just a moment ago. "What did you bring?" She asked still forcing herself to smile.

"A real classic. _To Catch a Thief_." He replied joining her.

"I love that movie." She exclaimed.

Tony turned the TV on and put the DVD in. "I know. It's your night. You deserve what's best." He then went sitting next to her on the couch. He pressed 'play' on the remote and bent over to take the glasses. He kept one and handed the other over to Ziva.

"Cheers!" He said moving his glass to hers.

"Cheers." She whispered as their glasses made contact.

She brought her legs up on the couch and snuggled herself onto him. At the same time he placed his arm around her and brought her even closer. His arms were magic. Only a few seconds near him and she already felt better. Maybe he will help her to forget about her problem, their problem, even if it was just for a short moment.

"Don't you drink?" Tony asked her seeing that she didn't touch the champagne.

"Yes." She hadn't taken any decision concerning her pregnancy yet, but she knew one thing, she wouldn't harm the baby by drinking alcohol. She just couldn't drink, so she just faked drinking by dipping her lips in the champagne, which made illusion to Tony's eyes. Right after that she put the glass on the floor and didn't touch it anymore.

About one hour later Tony looked down at Ziva. Her head was resting on his shoulder and her eyes were closed.

"You're falling asleep." He whispered.

"No I am not." She protested.

"Yes you are. What would you call it then?" He replied slightly mocking her.

"Resting. I was just resting my eyes." She answered, not really convinced herself.

"Resting huh? If you say so." He hadn't even had time to finish his sentence that again she was fighting to keep her eyes open. He didn't resist, apparently she needed the sleep. It was the third time this week that she fell asleep on the couch. He continued watching the movie alone.

When the closing credits appeared on the screen, Ziva was already deeply asleep. Delicately, he lifted her head, stood up and softly laid it down on the cushion again. He bent over her and lightly kissed her next to her eye. Then he settled himself on the armchair and watched her sleeping until he fell asleep too.

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TBC… Both of Ziva's tests turned out to be positive, but will agent David keep her baby?

**I would like to know what you think, so click and review, please.**


	13. Bad Day

**With the last chapter I hit the 100 reviews and even 101. I didn't expect to go this far when I first started the story. Thank you to all the reviewers.**

**The fic is slowly approaching to its end, only 4 chapters left and here is the first one of them.**

**Enjoy!**

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CHAPTER 13

**- Bad Day -**

The next morning the hunger awoke Ziva. She hadn't eaten anything for almost a day and her stomach was protesting. When she opened her eyes she saw Tony still asleep in the armchair near her. She glanced at her cell phone. It was 6:17 am. She had plenty time to have breakfast before going to work.

The smell of bacon slowly brought Tony out from his sleep. He stretched, rubbed his eyes and went and sat on the chair in the kitchen.

"Hey you! Sleep well?" Ziva asked him putting a plate in front of him.

"Like a baby." He answered without knowing that he just put his foot in his mouth.

Since she was up she had tried very hard to not think about it and she almost succeed, until now. The well known advice: _sleep on it_ didn't seem to have worked in her case. She was still at the same point as she was the day before, except that the initial shock had passed.

"Good." She said avoiding his look.

"You seem quiet this morning." Tony pointed out. "I thought you'd be happy to finally go back to work though. You've been talking about it for so long."

"I am happy about it, really." She smiled to prove it. "Coffee?"

"Yes, thanks. What about you?" He asked as there was only one cup on the table.

Obviously she couldn't tell the real reason why she wasn't drinking coffee, so she distorted the truth. "I have been up for a while, have already had mine." And it was true, she would had plenty of time to drink one if she had wanted to. "I am going to take a shower." She added walking towards the bedroom.

"Is there, by any chance, enough room for me?" He replied with a naughty smile.

She didn't really feel comfortable at that idea. It's not that she didn't want it nor that they had never done it before, but the fact that she was pregnant had changed something and she didn't want him to see her naked. But thinking about it she realized that there was no way he could notice anything at this stage. "There is only one way to find out."

Somehow the shower lasted longer than expected and now they were almost late for work.

"What car do we take?" Tony asked getting out the bedroom and adjusting is jacket.

"What do you mean by what car? We each take our own." She stated, confused.

"Why?"

"You know why. We agreed on keeping our relationship secret and arriving in the same car would only stir up a lot of questions and that's not what I want. That's not what we want." She sounded really irritated.

"Ziva, just in case you don't remember, we were used to go to work together before anything happened between us, so why stop now. Besides, wouldn't rather a sudden change of habit cause people to ask questions?"

"You have a point." His answer was quite logic there was nothing she could add to it.

"Wanna drive?" He tossed her the keys of his car.

She took a few seconds to think about it. "No thanks." She said handing him his keys back.

"Ok, now I'm sure something's going on. And it must be really serious because you never refuse to drive." Tony grabbed her shoulder and forced her to look in his eyes.

He was so determined that she wouldn't get away with an answer like: _No, everything's ok_. She had to tell him the truth, or at least a little part of the truth. "I just do not feel too well and I do not think it would be a good idea for me to drive, that's all. Happy?"

"Happy? Of course not! You should have told me earlier." He caressed her cheek with his finger and replaced a lock of her hair behind her ear.

"It would have been totally useless. There is nothing you could have done anyway."

"Maybe, but I'm your boyfriend and I need to know that kind of things."

"Alright, the next time you will be the first one to know." He seemed so concerned that she couldn't help herself from smiling.

"Good. Let's go now or we'll really be late." He said. And they both left Ziva's apartment.

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A few minutes later

While driving, Tony glanced at Ziva. She was pensively looking through the passenger side window. Her elbow was resting on the armrest and she was holding her head. When the car stopped at the traffic light, she turned her head towards him and unintentionally yawned.

"Tired already? You know you should really go see a doctor. It's not normal to wake up tired." Seeing her exhausted all the time worried him.

"Being tired is not an illness Tony. I am not going to a doctor just for that." But he was still right, in a way. Whatever her decision about her pregnancy would be she would have to make an appointment with her OB/GYN.

"It might not be an illness, but it could be a symptom. So promise me you'll go."

She had to approve to make him hush. "Yes mom!"

The light turned green and Tony started the car again. "That's the wiser choi…"

"TONY!" Ziva shouted pointing at a black Jeep, which was driving right onto them from the left side.

But the other driver was driving at such a high speed that Tony couldn't do anything. The vehicle crashed head-on onto them and completely smashed the driver side. The shock was so violent that the car was knocked to the right and kept going until its race was stopped by a streetlight. But the Jeep, still going at a high speed, had followed them and again hit them and the streetlight that had stopped them a few seconds ago was now totally deep-set on the passenger side.

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TBC… Again, it's not a good chapter and it's short, but it was necessary for the continuation of the fic. Hopefully the next chapter will be more interesting to read.


	14. Through the Smoke

**I ended the last chapter with a "little" cliffhanger yesterday, so I'm posting a new chapter today.**

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CHAPTER 14

**- Through the smoke -**

Ziva, still conscious, attempted to open her eyes. She hadn't moved yet but already her whole body hurt her terribly. The pain was so intense that she had no way to know where it came from. She squinted to get rid of the blood that was pouring into her eyes and blurring her vision. But it didn't help much. She then tried to wipe it with her hand and let out a cry as she felt an even sharper pain. She slightly looked down at her right arm and immediately understood why she could use it. A big gash was crossing it from the elbow to the wrist. She took a deep breath, but even that caused her pain. She realized that she had to ignore the protestations of her body if she wanted to do what she had to do; get out of the car before something worse happens. She lifted her left arm up and rubbed her eyes what allowed her to finally see things more clearly. The first thing that caught her attention was the smoke escaping from the front of the car, then, slowly she turned her head to the left making crack at least four bones in her neck and she saw Tony. His head was bent and he was apparently unconscious. He was covered with pieces of glass and other things she couldn't really identify. He had scratches all over his face and arms and seemed really badly hurt. She had to make sure he was only unconscious, like she assumed, and nothing worse.

The car was so crushed that she even had to fold her arm against her body to reach his shoulder and shake him. "To…" She wanted to say his name but the word didn't come out. She cleared her throat and tried again. "Tony,…Tony, open your eyes." She passed her fingers on his cheek, removed some splinters, but she got no answer. Her vision was still blurry, but she could distinctly see his chest move up and down. _That's a good sign_. She thought.

She lowered her hand to the bottom of the seat, unfastened her seatbelt and still with her left hand tried to open the door. She shook it several times until she realized that it was completely jammed against the streetlight. She had to find another way out. The slightest movement provoked horrible pain but that didn't keep her from approaching the windshield and feel that it wasn't there anymore. With her bloody hand she grabbed the frame and proceeded to pull herself out of the car when a voice, coming from the outside, stopped her.

"No ma'am, don't move. Don't move. Help is on its way, it won't be long anymore." A man approaching the car said.

His words were broken to her, but she still understood him. She let the frame go and very slowly she leaned back on the seat and rested her head which seemed to weigh twice its usual weight. Again she looked at Tony who was still motionless. She took his hand in hers and closed her eyes. All she could do now was waiting and hoping.

"Hold on Tony. The ambulance is almost here. They will get us out of here, you will see." She wanted to comfort him but at the same time she comforted herself too.

She wasn't certain of it, but when she opened her eyes again it seemed to her that she had lost consciousness too. She could hear the sirens now, they were very close. She looked down at Tony and realized that she wasn't holding his hand anymore; instead her hand was now protectively resting on her stomach. Her unconscious had made her realize what she wanted to do since she had found out she was pregnant; keep the child and protect its life. It wouldn't have taken that long if she hadn't been so determined to ignore the signs. It was all so obvious now; she didn't drink the Champagne and the coffee because, deep inside, she already knew that having an abortion wasn't the right choice for her. Suddenly she became angry at herself for having those thoughts. It was stupid to start to think about something she had most certainly lost at the moment of the crash. Why does it always have to be that way? Losing things you care about before you even know you cared about them. She didn't know how to get rid of that feeling and luckily, or not, her body decided for her and she passed out again.

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At the hospital

When she opened her eyes a few hours later, she almost remembered nothing that had happened after the firemen got her out of the car. Only a few flashes came to her in disorder. She remembered her arrival at the ER, some moments from the drive in the ambulance and she also remembered seeing that the firemen were having troubles getting Tony out.

The room where she was now was dark and quiet and strangely the pain was much more bearable. She was lying on a bed and judging by the smell she was definitely at the hospital. She ran her fingers on her face and felt the oxygen canula in her nose. Higher, just above her right eye, she felt the stitches from her cut on the forehead.

Suddenly she was blinded by a bright light and her eyes started to ache. She looked up and saw a young woman wearing a white lab coat entering her room.

"Where is Tony?" Ziva was still disoriented and that was the first thing that came to her mind. But the doctor kept walking in silence. "Where is Tony?" She repeated louder. "How is he? How bad are his injuries?"

"Was he in the same car?" The doctor asked. "I'm sorry, but I don't have the answers to your questions. It's not that I don't wanna help you, but I work in Obstetrics and I don't have the information. I'm really sorry…Your ER doctor told me you were pregnant and I'm here to examine you."

_"Oh my God!" _She thought. "Did I lose my baby?" Ziva worriedly, but calmly, asked.

"I don't know. I'm here to find out. I'm Dr. Kara Knight by the way."

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Ten minutes later

The exam didn't last very long and the doctor was already removing the gel on Ziva's stomach.

"Do you want me to call someone?" The Dr Knight kindly asked.

Ziva answered 'no' by shaking her head. No one knew about her pregnancy in first place, so she had no one to call now. And it was probably better that way.

"Then I think I'm going to leave you alone a moment." She said walking to the door.

Ziva nodded.

During the almost entire exam Ziva had looked away from the monitor. It was the only way she had found to protect herself from what she would see, or rather not see on the screen. She had the idea that if she detached herself from the situation maybe it wouldn't hurt her, or hurt her as much. But it was a completely stupid idea. She couldn't ignore the evidence and she couldn't ignore the doctor's words either. What she was feeling at this exact moment was something she would never forget. She had managed to retain her emotions as long as Dr. Knight had been in the room, but when she left she couldn't control herself anymore. She turned and cowered herself on her side and burst out sobbing. It was only when she finally fell asleep that the tears stopped running down her face.

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TBC… bad ending again, I'm evil.

**Two chapters left before the end.**


	15. One, Two and

**Thank you for all the comments, they are greatly appreciated.**

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**CHAPTER 15**

**- One, Two and… -**

Ziva hadn't been able to sleep more than half an hour before the pain on her arm awakened her. She slowly passed her fingers over the bandage. She reached for the remote and pressed the call button to get a nurse. She didn't have to wait long before one of them reached her room.

"I'm Marie, what can I do to help you my Dear?" A petite woman in her forties with black hair introduced herself.

"I need to find someone who knows about my…partner. His name is Anthony DiNozzo. He was with me in the car. He was still in the car when they brought me in the ambulance and I need to know how he is, so can you help me with that, Marie?" Ziva asked. It didn't even cross her mind to ask about pain killers.

"They brought him here about ten minutes after you. He has a severe concussion. He's in the Intensive Care Unit." She answered.

"I want to see him, please." Ziva tried to straighten herself with the help of her valid hand.

The nurse put her hand on Ziva's shoulder to make her lie on the bed again. "No, stay still. You can't go see him now. You have to rest…Besides he wouldn't even know you're there. Like I said, he has a pretty serious concussion and he is in a very critical state. I'm sorry darling, but he's in a coma and might not wake up before quite some time, if he ever does." Marie explained heartlessly.

"In a coma." Ziva repeated.

"Now get some rest. Your body needs it. I'm going to check on you again later." She stated leaving the room.

As the nurse advised her, Ziva stayed laid on her bed trying to find her sleep. Her eyes were closed, but all the things she had in mind were keeping her awake. Marie had been really clear, Tony's condition was bad and she wouldn't be able to sleep before having seen him, talked to him. She couldn't let him go without telling him something, something she should have told him a while ago already, but never did because she was too scared.

Her decision was made; she was going to see Tony, now. She lifted her injured arm and with the other hand removed the blue blanket. She moaned as she sat on the edge of her bed and rubbed her right side where she had three cracked ribs. That would have kept more than one from standing up, but not Ziva, her stubbornness was at least worth something. She put her hand on the bed-side table to help her up and started walking using everything that was around her as a support. The armchair, the bed, the walls and finally the door. She carefully opened it, hoping her bedroom wasn't just in front of the nurse's station. She sighed in a relief seeing that it wasn't. The board hanging on the ceiling said that Intensive Care was at the end of the hallway. She pressed her left hand on the wall while she kept the right arm against her body and slowly started to walk hoping she wouldn't get caught. Walking was way less painful than she had thought it would and after a few steps she even could walk without the help of the wall.

She pressed the red button, the ICU doors opened and she crossed them. First step accomplished, now she had to find Tony's room. She passed probably five rooms before finding his, and as discreetly as she had escaped her room she made her way into his. She moved close to his bed and watched him. The first thing that hit her was his peaceful look; there was no way one could tell he was in the coma. He could just have been asleep. Then her eyes travelled on his body; she noticed the bandage covering the left side of his face from his forehead to his temple and the IV hanging on his arm. He wasn't just asleep. Suddenly, the after-effect of her little trip in the hallway kicked in and her knees collapsed under the weight of her body. Still she managed to steady herself at the last minute by grabbing the bed. She was so exhausted that she couldn't even consider going back to her room, so disregarding the pain in her arm and ribs, she climbed on Tony's bed and curled up next to him. There wasn't much place for her, but it was already much more comfortable than her cold and empty bed. She hadn't forget the reason why she came here, so she leaned over him and started to whisper things she wanted to tell him in his ear. She talked to him for maybe five minutes before falling asleep.

In the meantime, in the nurse station, a wave of panic had came over Marie who had found Ziva's room empty. She went looking for her in the bathroom, but it was empty too. She didn't ask herself more questions; there was only one place where she could be. She had been pretty clear earlier; she wanted to see her partner, so ICU would be the next place to look. While walking she met another nurse, who apparently wanted to see her.

"I bet you're looking for someone." She said smiling.

"Why? Do you have an extra patient?" Marie asked her as they were now walking together.

"Sounds like it. Room 354. Is that her you're looking for?" She asked pointing at Ziva through the window.

"They told me in the ER that she wasn't very cooperative, but I didn't expect her to escape. I'm getting a wheelchair to bring her back." Nurse Marie stated.

"Wait! Didn't you tell me she needed plenty of rest? It would be a shame to wake her up as it seems she has found a perfect spot the get the rest she needs. Besides, it doesn't bother my patient, on contrary; feeling a presence help patients in coma to wake up faster."

"You're probably right. She told me he was her partner, but judging by what I see I guess they're more than just co-workers."

"It's so romantic."

"Romantic? Where do you see romance here? They just had a serious car accident." Marie exclaimed.

"Maybe, but she walked all the way to his room despite her pain just to be with him. I don't know anybody who would do that for me, you?"

"No. Thanks for pointing it out. You just ruined my day." Marie disappointedly replied before leaving. "Page me as soon as she's awake."

"Sorry. Will do."

Ziva's weight against his body was what Tony started to feel first, way before his awful headache. He had sensed her presence from the minute she had entered the room hours ago. And now, slowly awaking, he could also see her and feel her against him. He immediately felt reassured to see that she wasn't too badly hurt; all he could see was the cut on her forehead and the big bandage on her arm. He wanted to stroke her hair, which was messed up, but was too afraid he could awake her, so he just watched her. But suddenly, he felt her body tense and heard her groan like if she was having a nightmare. He extended his right arm and softly, with his fingers, started to caress her cheek.

"Shhh! It's ok, Princess. Everything's ok." He murmured.

"Tony?" Ziva asked with a very sleepy voice. She blinked several times while looking at him just to be sure he was really talking to her. "You are awake."

"I am. And judging by your surprised look I assume I wasn't just sleeping." He had no memories of the crash which is probably the only advantage of being unconscious.

"No you were not. You scared me to death; I thought I would never see those blue eyes again." She placed her hand on his face and with her thumb passed over his eye.

"Was it that bad?" He asked cracking a smile.

Tony was smiling already and to Ziva it was a good sign. But she couldn't answer to him, she had something else to tell him and she couldn't wait any longer. "I love you." She finally said looking straight in his eyes.

"Am I still sleeping and dreaming it or you just said you loved me?" He couldn't believe it. He had told her four weeks ago, but she never said it back. He had patiently waited because he knew she would say it when she would feel ready, and somehow, it was the perfect time.

"I said it…and I mean it." She couldn't take her eyes of off him and neither could he.

"Say it again." It was so sweet to his ears the first time that he wanted experience it again.

"I love you." She repeated with delight.

Their faces were less than a breath away and Tony felt the desire of kissing her. He began to tenderly kiss her forehead, moved down to her nose and then lovingly kissed her lips. They both shivered.

"It's way better to see you saying it." He said breaking their kiss, but she didn't seem to get it. "I heard you, I heard you when you told me those things while I was in the coma."

She moved away a little so she could look at him, but she stayed silent seeing that he was about to say something more.

"So…you're pregnant?" His question sounded more like a statement.

She was afraid he had heard that part of her speech and she wasn't sure how to answer him; she panicked. "I know how it looks like, but it is not. It was not planned. I already thought about it; our relationship is only at its very beginning and having a baby now would only ruin what we have. Not to mention that it is a big responsibility…" She was speaking so fast that it was hard for Tony to follow her.

"Ziva…" He started, but she ignored him.

"…I should have told you as soon as I found out but it was just too much to take in. But I swear I was about to tell you, I wouldn't have made any decision without talking to you first."

"Ziva…" He started again and again she kept ignoring him.

"Look, I do not want you to feel trapped or anything. This is a decision we have to make together and whatever your feelings about the situation are I want you to express them." She said and waited for his answer which didn't come. "So, do you have something to say?"

"Oh, because it's my turn to speak now?" He smiled. "Well, I know how you feel about the idea of having children. It's not something you're looking for and I don't blame you for that, you probably have your reasons."

"Tony wait…" Tony hushed her by putting his index on her lips.

"No Ziva, it's my turn, so please stop talking and listen to what I have to say. I'm not the one who's pregnant here therefore I'm not the one who has to make a decision. It's your body, your choice. But you asked for my opinion so here it is: I know since a long time now that I want to have children and I could have a dozen of them already if had wanted to, but I don't. I don't because I didn't have the right person in my life. You're the right person Ziva, you're the one with whom I want to have children. I don't try to convince you, I don't ask you to go against your feelings, I just want you to know that I love you and that I'll respect whatever your decision will be."

She had carefully listened to each of his words and now that he was finished she couldn't keep herself from silently crying.

It was the first time in three years he had seen her cry. "Look, Ziva I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you." Tony apologized thinking he was the one causing her tears.

"Don't be, you did not say anything wrong." She reassured him. "Before the accident, I had doubts about this unexpected pregnancy, a lot of doubts. I wasn't even close to think that I was ready for all this, but something's changed. When the doctor told me earlier that I was still pregnant I got overwhelmed by emotions, emotions I didn't even know I had in me. You are the first one I wanted to tell the good news because you are my right person too and I want to have our baby. Sorry it took me so long to realize it."

"Ziva David you'll always surprise me." He smiled. "I'd never thought you'd be so fine with the idea of having a baby."

She laughed. "I am not fine, I am not fine at all, I am terrified. I know nothing about babies or children. I don't know how to raise them, take care of them. And I can't even look in my own family for examples; my family is a complete mess. But this baby deserves its chance."

"Would it help if I told you that I'm scared too?" Tony said trying to reassure her.

"Not really." She smiled.

"But don't worry, we'll get along just fine and everything's gonna be alright. Most important is you and the baby are fine, that's what matters. You're both fine, right?" He suddenly started to worry.

"Huh…yes, everything's alright…so far."

"So far? What does that mean?" Her answer didn't really reassure him.

Ziva took a few seconds to try to find the words to not scare him too much. "The shock was pretty violent Tony and the doctor said that at this stage of pregnancy the embryo is still very fragile, but as long as I do not feel cramps or have bleeding it should be fine." She explained.

Tony's hand was still on her cheek and he was softly caressing it. "And? How are you feeling?...And I don't wanna hear the answer from the strong and brave Ziva; I wanna know how you're really feeling." He kindly warned her.

"Well, all my body is sore, but I guess that's quite normal. My ribs hurt when I take deep breaths and I can't really use my arm." She passed her fingers on the bandage.

"What happened?" He asked her. But he already knew it was a pretty bad judging by what he could see through the white bandage.

"Some piece of the door snicked it over 7 inches; they used staples to stitch it up, but they gave me pain killers so right now it is completely painless." She lied, even if he had asked her no to, she couldn't help herself.

He passed his hand on her arm too and started to feel really bad seeing how long her cut was. Ziva immediately noticed his concerned look and cuddled up to him. "It is less serious than it seems, really." She said.

She watched him as he slowly moved his hand and delicately rested it on her stomach. "I love you." He then said kissing her.

She put her hand on the top of his. "I love you." She said back, not afraid to say it anymore.

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**TBC... Yay! The baby and Tony are both alive. I couldn't make them die, and I think you didn't want them to die either. **

**Sadly the story will end in the next chapter. I will post it tomorrow.**

**Thanks for reading.**


	16. 722

**A/N: That's it, that's the last chapter, but I have to say that it's not the real end because I plan on writing a sequel later. **

**I want to thank all the people who followed my story, you were all a fantastic support and source of encouragement for my first big fic in English, so thank you very much to everyone.  
****And a special thank you to my betareader Jessica who took the time to read and correct my story, she did an excellent job.**

**I would really appreciate if all the readers, not only the usual reviewers, took a few seconds to review that last chapter and let me know what they think and what they want to see in the sequel.**

**I hope you'll enjoy it and sorry for the mistakes in my A/N (I didn't send it to my beta for corrections lol)**

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CHAPTER 16

**- 722 -**

Around 10:30 am the next morning. Abby, McGee and Gibbs were in the hospital elevator on their way to the Medical Unit. Abby had her hand on the wall and was nervously tapping on it with her black fingernails. She was anxious and quite upset. Upset because they were already here the day before but hadn't had a chance to see neither Tony nor Ziva. Tony was still in Intensive Care where only members of immediate family are allowed to visit patients, as for Ziva, the doctors were still taking care of her injured arm. Instead of going back to work Abby would have preferred to wait until they get Ziva back in her room, but Gibbs had convinced her that it would be better for her to get some rest before she sees anyone.

"Running out of caffeine Abs?" Gibbs said placing his hand on hers to make that annoying sound stop.

"Too nervous to eat or drink anything and you should too Gibbs, they almost died yesterday."

"You heard the doctors as well as I did, they're fine." He removed his hand and she started the game with her fingers again.

"Well, I'm a scientist, so I'll only believe it when I see it." She stated moving closer to the door and eagerly awaiting for them to open.

"They moved Tony from Intensive Care Unit to Medical Unit, that's already something." McGee tried to prove her that they were indeed better.

"People die in Medical too." She was negative today and nothing could make her change her mood.

"No one's gonna die Abby." Gibbs firmly said.

The doors weren't even entirely opened that Abby already made her way through them. She almost ran towards Tony's room, which wasn't easy with her wedge heels. McGee and Gibbs were watching her quite amused. She turned the handle of the door and opened without knocking, but didn't enter. She turned round and pounced on the first nurse she saw.

"What happened to Tony? He's not in his room anymore…Don't tell me that he's…Gibbs! You said no one was gonna die?" Abby was imagining the worse and was giving to Gibbs an accusing look.

The nurse, who was actually nurse Marie, was a little confused at Abby's behavior. "Are you talking about the patient of room 415?" She bent over to read the number on the door and everyone nodded. "Be reassured, he's not dead. He woke up yesterday around 11pm and there shouldn't be any consequences resulting from his coma."

"So where is he?" Abby asked almost cutting Marie off.

"We had to move him in another room." She started walking and invited them to follow her. "He's in the 722 now."

"722." McGee repeated. "Isn't that Ziva's room?"

"If you're talking about his partner, then yes. It was the only way to keep them from moving all the time." Marie answered smiling.

Her remark went unnoticed to the others but not to Abby; she could well imagine them disobeying the doctors' orders just to be together.

"It's over there." Nurse Marie said pointing at a door a few steps away. "They're both awake, but don't stay too long."

Abby, still shocked by the thought of Tony being dead, rushed into the room. Tony was the first one she saw, so he was the first one to be hugged, but not too tight. "One could say that frightening people is your thing, and it works for you both." She said then looking at Ziva, who was in the bed on the left.

"I'm thinking of doing it professionally, you?" Tony replied as a joke and then turned to Ziva.

Abby let Tony go and went to Ziva.

"Only if it is well paid." She answered just before Abby throws herself on her.

"Didn't you promise me to never scare me again?" Abby asked Ziva remembering the conversation they'd had after the plane explosion.

"I know, sorry. I think I will not make that kind of promises anymore, because obviously I can not keep them."

"I didn't expect to see you so…so…"

"So what McGee? Alive?" Tony cut him off and laughed.

"Tony, you didn't see the car, we did and frankly I would never have thought someone got out of it alive, so excuse us if we're stunned to see you so healthy." McGee was irritated by Tony's bad joke.

"Sorry, Probie. I didn't know you were that concerned." Tony apologized seeing that McGee wasn't the only one having been affected by their accident.

"We were all very concerned Tony, so stop acting like that. It's a shame that the shock on your head didn't help you growing up." Abby stated sitting on the edge of Ziva's bed. "But you're ok and that's all that matters."

"Yes, we are all fine, what more could we want?" Ziva said exchanging a knowing glance with Tony.

"Maybe there is a little something." Gibbs, who had remained silent all the time, said. He walked from the middle of the room to her bed and handed her a small box awkwardly wrapped up.

Ziva was more than surprised at Gibbs' gesture; he wasn't the kind of person who offers gifts. She took it and ripped it open, and then, in the middle of the paper, she saw a badge. It was maybe because of the surprise and the pride she felt at that moment, and most probably because of the hormones too, but she suddenly was very moved and almost cried.

"A real one this time." Gibbs added. "I should have delivered it to you yesterday, but let's say that you were quite busy."

"Thank you Gibbs. It means a lot to me." Despite of her emotion, Ziva managed to keep her voice steady.

"From a Special Agent to another, I'm glad I didn't have to deliver it posthumously." Gibbs smiled at her and she smiled back.

"When do they release you?" Abby asked.

"They said they'll discharge us in 4 days. And if I behave they said I could go back to work next Monday, so you won't miss my charming presence for too long." Tony answered with a grin.

"What about you?" McGee asked Ziva.

"Thanks to my stupid arm I have two weeks of sick leave and 5 physical therapy sessions before they allow me to return to work. But I will be sitting at me desk the second my leave is over." She explained.

"I don't doubt that." Gibbs stated.

"Two weeks of sick leave? I don't wanna be there to see how you handle it." McGee said. It was hard to imagine for everyone that she could stay at home for two long weeks.

What she hadn't told them is that she not only had to stay home but she was on a complete bed rest for at least one week to give her baby all its chances. Resting wasn't something she was used to do but this time the stakes were too important.

"Visiting hours are over. You can come back this afternoon." Marie informed them passing her head through the door.

Everyone was now gone and Tony was quietly sitting in his bed blankly staring at the wall in front of him. He was thinking about something that had crossed his mind during the night.

Silently, Ziva was watching him. She could tell he had something in mind because of the smile on his lips.

"What are you thinking?" She was curious, but in the meantime, knowing Tony, his answer could be completely stupid.

He closed his eyes, shook his head in incomprehension and let out a laugh. "How do you do that? Am I that transparent?"

"Maybe you are, or maybe I just start to know you well. So, what are you thinking? And don't even think about answering the blond nurse with big boobs from this morning." She warned him smiling.

He didn't remember that nurse, but he was so happy he could teaser her with that. "Now that you're talking about her, she didn't look bad, not bad at all."

Ziva grabbed the wrapping paper, shaped it into a little ball and softly threw it on Tony making sure to avoid his head. She knew he was just joking, but she was also glad things were back to normal between them.

"Ouch!" He exclaimed as the paper hit his left arm. "You do know I was kidding, right? Besides, in a few weeks you will have nothing to envy her anyway." He said staring at her breast.

"That's what you were thinking of? My breast? I knew I shouldn't have asked you."

"Don't worry, I wasn't thinking about that." He stood up, walked the three steps that separated their beds and sat on hers. "I have something more serious to talk about. You told me yesterday you were pregnant and that's fantastic, but you didn't mention how far along you were."

"Oh, that. Well, the doctor isn't 100 sure because it's quite early, but she said I was around four weeks pregnant. We will know for sure at the next ultrasound." Ziva explained. "But I thought a lot about it last night and I do have my own idea about when it happened."

Tony frowned. Obviously he was very curious to hear what she had in mind.

"You remember our first date, about four weeks ago, and that great French restaurant?...Restaurant where we did not go?" She continued and waited for his reaction.

"You really think it happened back then? Our first time?" He asked.

"Well, it is the only time we forgot to be careful, so it is either that or you got me pregnant despite two different contraceptive methods. And I know you're good Tony, but not that good."

He smiled "Yeah, we got quite carried away that night, but I don't regret anything. It was a perfect night on any levels."

She was pensively looking at Tony and a small satisfied smile drew on her lips as she was replaying that night in her head, with all its details. "It surely was." She finally replied.

Tony stared at Ziva's still flat stomach.

"We're going to be parents. Do you believe that Ziva? I, Anthony DiNozzo, am going to be a father. That's just incredible. I can't wait." Tony said before leaning to her and kiss her to make her feel how much he was in love with what they had become: a family.

**FIN**

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Bye, see you soon with the sequel, I hope.


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